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Then the memory of her face came back, and with it a raging, intolerable desire to be alone […]. At the sight of the words I love you the desire to stay alive had welled up in him, and the taking of minor risks suddenly seemed stupid. It was not till twenty-three hours, when he was home and in bed – in the darkness, where you were safe even from the telescreen so long as you kept silent – that he was able to think continuously. (2.1.20)
Flustered by the note and Julia’s interest in him, Winston feels alive again, no longer hampered by the sexual repression that restricted him earlier.
He thought of her naked, youthful body, as he had seen it in his dream. He had imagined her a fool like all the rest of them, her head stuffed with lies and hatred, her belly full of ice. A kind of fever seized him at the thought that he might lose her, the white youthful body might slip away from him! What he feared more than anything else was that she would simply change her mind if he did not get in touch with her quickly. (2.1.21)
Sexually repressed for years now, the thought of having Julia stirs and scares Winston at once.