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The Bald Soprano
by Eugene Ionesco
Mrs. Smith Timeline and Summary
Recounts in great detail what her family has eaten previously in the evening. Discusses Dr. Mackenzie's bizarre medical practices with her husband. Discusses with her husband those pesky and confusing Bobby Watsons. Throws socks at her husband when he insults her. Tells Mary they've been waiting all night for the Martins. Goes upstairs with her husband to change. Returns downstairs, having not changed. Makes awkward conversation with the Martins. Answers the door several times after the doorbell rings – every time no one is there. Concludes that whenever the doorbell rings no one is there. Bickers with her husband over her theory. Is very displeased when her husband answers the door and the Fire Chief is outside. Listens to Fire Chief's weird fables. Kisses the Fire Chief a couple times. Tells a story about a fiancé who gave his bride-to-be some flowers and then took them back. Is offended when Mary, the maid, wants to tell a story. Is even more offended when she learns of Mary's past love affair with the Fire Chief. Helps to push Mary offstage. Starts spouting a lot of crazy nonsense. Is replaced by Mrs. Martin.