Candide and Cacambo stop for a meal. While they eat, Candide despairs about Cunégonde.
They stop to rest by a meadow and observe the lovely scenic and tranquil environment: birds chirping, water gurgling, naked women running around with monkeys trying to bite their buttocks. This really happens.
Candide does what any normal man would do when faced with butt-biting monkeys: he shoots them. Again he acts first and asks questions later.
He’s feeling pretty good about himself until he sees that the girls are crying.
Cacambo informs him that the monkeys were the girls’ lovers.
The men hide to avoid these hysterical women and go to sleep.
When they wake up, they are bound and unable to move.
The people of the girls, the Oreillons, plan to boil and skewer the men for food.
Cacambo explains to their captors in the native tongue that they are not Jesuits, the enemy of the Oreillons, but if fact have just killed a Jesuit and stolen his clothes.
The Oreillons confirm Cacambo’s story, release the men, and treat them as honored guests. How fortunate! This is surely the best of all possible worlds.