Do you want to be an endocrinologist? Do you aspire to become a god of the glands? That's great. Now what exactly does that mean?

It means you're going to be a physician, which is a fancy word for doctor. As an endocrinologist you'll deal with glands, which are itty-bitty parts of the body that produce the hormones that rule our lives. Hormones control all things such as energy, metabolism, growth, fertility, and acne. But let's dig a little deeper, shall we?

In the case of a faulty thyroid gland, a gland that looks like a moth stuck in the middle of your neck, your body could make too much of a hormone and burn up calories faster than Joey "Jaws" Chestnut scarfs down hotdogs. Too little thyroid hormones and you have a glandular condition like the one your aunt Ida claims to have had for the past 30 years. You know, the one that prevents her from losing weight.

Maybe you know someone with diabetes and want to help them. Insulin is a major player in diabetes, and it's, you guessed it, a hormone. If not properly kept in check, diabetes can lead to blindness, stroke, and even death. No need to sugar coat it, diabetes is a drag. But that's where you come in, right?

Now you can be a general endocrinologist or decide to practice within a certain specialty. If you like working with kids, for example, you could become a pediatric endocrinologist. You'd help children battle thyroid issues and diabetes, while also helping them grow. Some kids need to take daily shots of human growth hormone to replace the stuff that's missing in their bodies, and it's an endocrinologist who will diagnose, prescribe, and monitor these kids as they grow.

You may also be responsible for helping people with fertility problems. That's right, puberty, fertility, obesity—all the good ity's will be in your domain. Talk about power!

Look, the bottom line here is that endocrinologists are important. Like, really important. Here, maybe watching a funky video on the endocrine system with a snarky, animated robot will help convince you.

Better?

We hope you like school, because you'll be in it for a while. Like, 14 or so years, a while. You're looking at four years for an undergraduate degree, four years of medical school, three of a residency, and another three years working and studying your sub-specialty in a fellowship program. No wonder endocrinologists charge so much, they accumulate some serious debt from all those student loans.

In addition to being incredibly smart, also you'll need to be a people person. Pediatric endocrinologists, in particular, should like kids. If you're not a people person, you can always fake it; however, you'll be a lot better at your job if you have a good bedside manner and a way of explaining complicated things in non-medical terms. You'll also have to be a good team player. Many endocrine problems affect other areas of the body, so you'll most likely be conferring with colleagues with other specialties, such as cardiologists, ophthalmologists, obstetricians, podiatrists, and oncologists.

You'll have to become licensed and board certified by the American Board of Internal Medicine—that can't be an easy panel to impress.

You'll either have your own office, which means you'll have to hire a support staff; or you'll work in a hospital outpatient clinic. You can also research endocrine disorders, or you could teach people who are aspiring endocrinologists (although most teachers and researchers are also working practitioners too). Either way, you'll probably keep plenty busy, especially if you've gotten yourself a good reputation with the other doctors. Patient referrals are a lovely thing, unlike those behavioral referrals that get you sent to the dean.

Most of your patients will be scheduled in advance, so you'll be able to set your own hours. No need to worry, you'll likely have plenty of time to spend with your family or your pet llama. You'll be making a pretty sweet salary to boot, so you can enjoy living a nice, cushy lifestyle. Ready for that vacay? Great, but you've got some work to do first.

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