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Fighter Pilot


Stress? Hah! Executing barrel rolls at Mach 1.5? Nothing! Bearing down on an enemy MiG with two more on your tail? Child's play! Being responsible for the aerial safety of the Leader of the Free World? Piece of Cake! Taking orders from an aging Desert Storm vet who spits when he yells? You can take it! Having to routinely use a piddle pack? Well….

Being a fighter pilot involves boatloads (or planeloads) of stress—entire aircraft carriers of stress. Enlisted military serviceman/woman is considered to be one of the most stressful jobs in the world to begin with, and fighter pilot is one of the most stressful jobs in the military. Even if we set aside the fact that you are quite actively risking your life every single time you strap into your jet, there are still a bazillion other factors involved that would stress anybody out: the sheer cost of the machinery you are responsible for; the lives of all those on the ground/aircraft carrier beneath you as you take off, land, and fly around in a 20,000-lb. hunk of metal and jet fuel; the safety of your squadron—heck, your country—if whatever mission you're flying goes F.U.B.A.R.; being barked at day and night by your superior officers; having every moment of your life regimented and controlled; and seriously, HAVING TO WEAR A PIDDLE PACK.

If you want to become a fighter pilot, we whole-heartedly support you. We are huge fans of anyone and everyone willing to risk his or her life to protect us and the rest of this great nation. Just know that it is a SUPER STRESSFUL JOB, so you might want to get those daddy issues in check ahead of time.

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