Bell Curve

Bell Curve

1
5%

Yoga-urt. Salary: $8 

You've turned your love of yoga into a career and you've gotten a studio to let you teach your first class. You show up ready to give an incredible lesson to willing students. Instead, your class consists of two women who spend the whole hour talking to each other while copying the poses you do out of the corner of their eyes.

2
25%

Basic Yogist. Salary: $8,000 

Pulling the night shift at the yoga loft downtown doesn't bring in a lot of clients, but it does have its perks. You get to watch the moon rise over the city while encouraging good focus and a strong core. You also get to chill with people who think they're vampires. The undead need good posture too.

3
50%

Yo-Gan-Do-It. Salary: $18,000 

One of your longtime clients tells you he's no longer suffering from back pain. You congratulate him and ask him which poses work the best. He says he was lying on his stomach while the doctors were performing surgery on his spine. You keep the smile on your face but inside you're dying a little.

4
75%

Yoga Nut. Salary: $28,000 

As one of the most popular yogis at the fitness center, you get first pick of timeslots to hold your class. You decide you're no longer cool with being in at 5:00AM, so you let your clients know they can come in at 11:00AM instead. You can almost hear the screams of delight as you change it on the website.

5
95%

Yo-Gan Go Your Own Way. Salary: $38,000 

You've opened your very own yoga practice and are relieved to teach yoga exactly the way you prefer it. Your unique brand of vigorous yoga, dozens of push-ups, and mid-asana confessional poetry slams is a runaway success. The local new age magazine wants to interview you. Namaste, indeed.