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There is, however, a catch. A Catch-22, of course.
Colonels Cathcart and Korn blame Yossarian for the men's decreasing morale. Yossarian's refusal to fly is stirring up controversy within the ranks.
So the Colonels have come up with a despicable little deal to send Yossarian home without causing too much of an outrage with the men.
Yossarian asks what it is, but the Colonels keep avoiding the question.
Eventually, they tell him. All Yossarian has to do is be "like us." Which is a bad thing.
He must say good things about the administration back in the States.
Colonels Cathcart and Korn want to be promoted and don't want General Peckem or Scheisskopf to catch wind of any tension between them. So they want Yossarian to stop being a thorn in their sides and become their pal.
If Yossarian refuses, they say, he'll be hit with a court martial.
Yossarian says, "OK."
The Colonels rejoice. Colonel Korn tells Yossarian to call him "Blackie" and to call Colonel Cathcart "Chuck." They begin calling Yossarian "Yo-Yo." They're all chummy now.
As Yossarian leaves, elated, Nately's prostitute ambushes him. She is dressed as a private in green fatigues.
Yossarian faints from fear.
He is saved only when Cathcart and Korn run out and scare her away.