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Centaurs

The centaurs are total animals. Actually, scratch that. Really, they're just half animals, with the lower body of a horse and the upper body of a man. But even with their manly torsos, they mostly act like wild animals. The most famous tribe of these horse-men lives on Mt. Pelion in Thessaly, where they spend most of their time galloping around, swilling wine, swiping women, and hitting things with rocks. Yeah, they're not the brainiest bunch.

Note: Chiron, the gentle centaur and teacher of the stars, was totally different from his wild cousins. Don't forget it.

Basic Information

NameCentaurs
NicknameFamous centaurs:
Eurytion (who started a war by trying to snatch his half-brother's bride)
Nessus (who caused the death of Heracles)
Pholus (who got into trouble for giving Heracles too much wine)
Chiron (the gentle teacher)
SexMostly males (some females called centaurides)
Current cityThe woods

Work & Education

OccupationHappily unemployed
EducationChiron's School of Etiquette (drop-outs, obviously)

Beliefs

Political viewsPro-Zeus

Family & Friends (& Enemies)

ParentsIxion (Dad)
Nephele (Mom)
SiblingsBunches
ChildrenUm, yeah, all over the place
FriendsThe Satyrs
Dionysus
EnemiesPirithous (the king who practically annihilated us)
Theseus (who helped Pirithous)
Atalanta (who also helped Pirithous)
Heracles (who killed a bunch of us too)

Relationships

Relationship statusLooking for love
Interested inCentaurides (girl centaurs)
Nymphs (all kinds)
Human maidens

Favorites

Quotations"In Wildness is the preservation of the world."
– Henry David Thoreau

"Don't approach a goat from the front, a horse from the back, or a fool from any side."
– Yiddish Proverb

"Man is the cruelest animal."
– Friedrich Nietzsche

"We don't need no education."
– Pink Floyd

"I like girls that drink beer."
– Toby Keith
BooksThe Lion, the Witch, and the Wardrobe by C.S. Lewis (Lewis really gets how awesome we are) 
All the Pretty Horses by Cormac McCarthy 
Paul Revere's Ride by Henry Wadsworth Longfellow (Cool poem, but how come nobody knows the name of Paul's horse?) 
Lord of the Flies by William Golding (Hmmm, guess humans can get pretty brutal, too.)
The Call of the Wild by Jack London 
Animal Farm by George Orwell (Boxer is the man. Well, the horse. Well, he'd be better if he was a man-horse... whatever, we like him.) 
The Red Pony by John Steinbeck 
Gulliver's Travels by Jonathan Swift (We're all about the smart horses of Houyhnhnm Land—even if they are a little stuck up.) 
The Bacchae by Euripides (Dionysus really knows how to let his hair down.) 
Slaughterhouse-Five by Kurt Vonnegut (We cry with Billy Pilgrim when he sees the suffering horses in Dresden.) 
MusicDown on the Street by the Stooges (Iggy, you rock our faces off.) 
Blitzkrieg Bop by the Ramones (We miss you, Joey Ramone!)
Sweet Home Alabama by Lynyrd Skynyrd (Yeah, we're country boys at heart.)
Paper Planes by M.I.A. 
Welcome to the Jungle by Guns N' Roses
Nights of Wine and Roses by Japandroids (The new stuff we're rocking out to.) 
Another Brick in the Wall, Part 2 by Pink Floyd (Education? What's that?)
MoviesDie Hard 
The Hangover 
Deliverance 
Fantasia (Some of the hottest centaur ladies you'll ever see.) 
Black Beauty 
The Bourne Identity (Really, all the Bourne movies—he just kicks butt.) 
All the Pretty Horses 
The Black Stallion 
TV ShowsHell on Wheels 
Sons of Anarchy 
Mr. Ed 

Activities & Interests

LikesBurning Man 
Oktoberfest
Rodeos
Westerns
ActivitiesDrinking
Chasing girls, nymphs, centaurides, and fillies
Hitting people with rocks and clubs
InterestsOenology
The study of ladies (oh yeah)
GroupsThe Society for Half-Animal Rights
Party Animals
Horse Lovers 
The Coalition for Centaur Rights
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