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Circe

Circe

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Home Mythology Circe Text Messages

Text Messages

Shmoop's crack team of P.I.s recently used its awe-inspiring detective skills to hack into the text messages of Circe. Several of them were not-so-mysteriously transformed into pigs not long afterward. We at Shmoop salute the sacrifice they made to bring the world the inside scoop on the immortal sea witch. 

                                       Odysseus

                              August 27, 1:00 A.M.

                                                            Hey baby, what's going
                                                            on?

Who is this?

                                                            I'll give you a hint.

It's kind of late for this.

                                                            Aren't you dead now?
                                                           Do you really need
                                                            sleep?

Just give me your hint
already.

                                                            It's the most beautiful
                                                            woman you've ever
                                                            laid your eyes on.

Helen?

                                                            I should've turned you
                                                            into a pig right along
                                                            with your men when
                                                            you landed on Aeaea.
                                                            I should've had myself
                                                            a BBQ and fed you to
                                                            my lions.

Oh hi, Circe. How've
you beanie weenies?

*been

                                                            I'll be much better after
                                                            I punish you for that
                                                            insult.

Can you give me a
break, please? It's the
middle of the night.

                                                            It's always night in the
                                                            Underworld! I would've
                                                            thought you figured that
                                                            out way back when
                                                            I told you how to get
                                                            there when you were alive.

Yes, yes... you were
very helpful—well,
after you decided to
turn my men back
into men anyway.

                                                            Well, you have a chance
                                                            to repay me. I'm heading
                                                            down to the Underworld
                                                            to visit Hecate, and I
                                                            thought maybe we could
                                                            get together for a little
                                                            rendezvous.

No can do. Penelope
would kill me.

                                                            Oh, come on. I'll turn her into
                                                            a macaroni for the evening.

????

                                                            *monkey

Do you know how
many suitors she refused
while I was gone?
The least I can do is
be loyal now that she's
dead.

                                                            Didn't the time you
                                                            spent with me mean
                                                            anything?

Sure, sure, sure...

Look got to go. Penelope
is about to wake up.
Turning phone off.

                                         Scylla

                              August 28, 6:00 AM

                                                            Who's my favorite sea
                                                            monster?

Who is this?

                                                            I'll give you a hint.

I eat hints.

                                                            Fine, you're no fun.
                                                            It's Circe.

HOW THE HADES
DID YOU GET MY
NUMBER!!!

                                                            Glaucus.

WHAT?!!! HE HAS
THE NERVE TO GET
WHAT HE THINKS
IS A LOVE POTION
FROM YOU AND
POUR IT IN A POOL
OF WATER AND RUN
AWAY AS SOON
AS I TURN INTO THIS
AWFUL MONSTER
AND THEN HE GIVES
YOU MY NUMBER????
HOW DID HE EVEN
GET MY NUMBER?

                                                            JK! It wasn't Glaucus.

What?

                                                            It was Charybdis.

I hate that whirlpool.
I thought he was my
friend.

                                                            Oh, he is. Look, I've
                                                            got a favor to ask.

Why would I help you?
You turned me into a
monster just because you
were jealous that Glaucus
liked me more than
you. I DIDN'T EVEN
LIKE HIM.

                                                            In retrospect, it does
                                                            seem a bit rash.

>:(

                                                            Look, what would you
                                                            say if I mixed up a little
                                                            potion that turned you
                                                            back into a succulently
                                                            beautiful nymph.

I'd say you were trying
to trick me.

                                                            No tricks!

What would I have to
do?

                                                            Well, you've heard of
                                                            Odysseus' wife, Penelope.

Yeah.

                                                            Don't you think Penelope
                                                            is such a tasty name?

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