Who's the macho man? Even before the first line of "The Colonel," you know you're dealing with not just a colonel, but the colonel, a man of power. Alongside the speaker, you enter the lair of a military ruler who has position, money, and rank, and who is not afraid to use them. He's got a gun on a pillow, a wall that can shred a man's kneecaps, and a maid he calls with a gold bell. The colonel's used to giving orders, and having people obey.
It may sound funny to some, but the ears of this poem are the final heroes.
Sure, the colonel is a creep now, but power corrupts even those who might start out with good intentions.