From 11:00PM PDT on Friday, July 1 until 5:00AM PDT on Saturday, July 2, the Shmoop engineering elves will be making tweaks and improvements to the site. That means Shmoop will be unavailable for use during that time. Thanks for your patience!
Our narrator has fallen asleep at work. He's the last guy in the building. For some reason he smells gasoline on his hands.
Tyler calls, saying that a driver is waiting to take our narrator on a little trip.
In the car, a mechanic from Project Mayhem rants about daddy issues and God while playing chicken with other cars on the Interstate, and our narrator holds a birthday cake complete with lit candles. It's all very philosophical. Go read it.
The mechanic ends up wrecking the car, leaving our narrator with a life lesson and a face full of buttercream frosting.