Meditation at Lagunitas
How we cite our quotes:
There was a woman
I made love to and I remembered how, holding
her small shoulders in my hands sometimes,
I felt a violent wonder at her presence
like a thirst for salt, for my childhood river
with its island willows, silly music from the pleasure boat,
muddy places where we caught the little orange-silver fish
called pumpkinseed.(lines 16-23)
This is a pastoral poem, so it makes sense that even the act of sex is a celebration of natural scenery. The speaker has a very mature perspective of sex. He can talk about it openly without being juvenile or focusing on the pleasure that it gives him. He tries to uncover the source of his desire, which doesn’t have much to do with sex at all. The sudden shift into memory in these lines makes the encounter with the woman all the more mysterious.
It hardly had to do with her.
Longing, we say, because desire is full
of endless distances. I must have been the same to her. (lines 23-25)
We can imagine someone getting really offended if he/she knows that their lover thinks his or her desire "hardly had to do" with him/her. But, is it really so offensive? If that’s the way things are, then he is just being honest, and honesty is a very important part of any close relationship. Plus, she is associated with really happy memories, which can be kind of flattering. Most importantly, the speaker seems perfectly comfortable with the idea that she can relive her own memories through him.
But I remember so much, the way her hands dismantled bread,
the thing her father said that hurt her, what
she dreamed. (lines 26-28)
The relationship with the woman is more than just sexual, more than just a random hook-up. He eats with her, discusses her family history, and listens to her dreams. How does this change the way that we feel about the speaker?