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Stay calm. You don't want to be the one freaked-out buffalo who starts a stampede. You'll be ribbed for weeks.

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    Shmooge turned back to his bed and shrieked. There was a baby lying in the middle of the bed, sucking a pacifier and watching him with eerily adult-looking eyes. As the watched, the baby screwed up her mouth in a grimace as if preparing to spit and the pacifier went flying across the room, landing with a ‘plop’ in the corner.

    “That thing was driving me crazy,” the baby spoke in a man’s baritone that almost made Shmooge shriek again. “Barry White,” the baby told him, as if reading his mind....

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