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Surfing dinosaurs in powdered wigs are awesome...but not in your essay. Those responses should make sense.

Performance Review

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Performance Review

The Reveal

Bubbie and Bertie couldn't believe what they just heard. Marx had just delivered his performance review of the foundation's portfolio, and to say it wasn't what they expected would have been a colossal understatement.

Marx shrugged. "It is what it is. I wish I had better news."

"Better news?" Bertie repeats. "Myron is up 22% in the first six months, and you're up just 1%? What are you guys even doing over here?"

"A fixed-income heavy portfolio just doesn't pay off in this market,"...

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