From 11:00PM PDT on Friday, July 1 until 5:00AM PDT on Saturday, July 2, the Shmoop engineering elves will be making tweaks and improvements to the site. That means Shmoop will be unavailable for use during that time. Thanks for your patience!
Clay is trying to decide where to go next when he hears Tony call his name. Tony blinks his car lights and tells Clay to get in.
"You are the ninth person I've had to follow," he says (11.16). It turns out he has the second set of tapes, the set that's supposed to be made public if the people on the tapes don't follow Hannah's rules. (See "Cassette 1: Side A.")
Tony asks Clay how far into the tapes he is, and Clay tells him he just finished Ryan's tape.
Clay wants to know why Hannah gave Tony the second set. (So do we.)
Tony says he'll explain after Clay listens to the next one – Clay's tape.
He offers to drive Clay while he listens, and Clay agrees. He's crying as he presses the play button.
Clay's tape starts like this: "Romeo, oh Romeo. Wherefore art though, Romeo" (11.46).
Hannah says that she wanted to know Clay better because nobody ever said anything bad about him. People only had good things to say.
It became a game she played: "How long could I go on hearing nothing but good things about Clay Jensen?" (11.66).
Hannah says she's sure her listeners are thinking she's about to reveal something bad about Clay. She's sure they're just waiting to hear the dark secret that will "ruin his image" (11.71).
But that's not the way it is. "Clay, honey, your name does not belong on this list" (11.75).
Clay is part of her story, but not in the same way as the others on the list. Whew.
She says that the next stories are "centered around one night" (11.94), and Clay knows exactly what night she's talking about – the night of the party.
Hannah says she was grounded the night of the party because her grades were getting worse and worse. But she snuck out when she heard Clay would be there.
It was a rare opportunity to meet up with him, since he hardly ever went to parties.
Hannah walked to the party. It was misty from all the rain they'd been getting.
And on her way, she felt hope for the first time. She thought something good would happen at the party.
All she wanted was to find Clay and have a real conversation with him… finally.
Clay thinks about this. He knows why they had never gotten the chance to talk before that: he was worried that the rumors about her would turn out to be true, so he held back.
Hannah couldn't believe it when all of the sudden Clay was there next to her, saying he thought they should talk. Amazing.
The two of them went into the living room. Jessica Davis and Justin Foley were making out on the couch (ugh), so Clay and Hannah sat on the side.
Hannah says that she and Clay talked for a long time and had a really good conversation.
After a while, they got up to try to find a quiet place to talk (i.e. not next to a make-out sesh).
That place turned out to be a bedroom upstairs. For the first time, Hannah felt like she wasn't all alone in the world.
But she was still really afraid. If this went badly, it would be so much more painful than all the other things. But she decided to trust the connection. So she kissed him.
Clay thinks back: wait a second, it was he who kissed her.
Hannah says the kissing was fantastic, and Clay agrees. Aw.
She stresses the fact that all she and Clay did was kiss. She also points out that nobody ever heard about that kiss, because Clay never told anyone.
But there's a problem. When Hannah started thinking about Justin and how he had spoiled their beautiful kiss, she freaked out. She told Clay to stop and yelled at him until he left the room.
After he left, she started to cry. Her head was spinning; she'd had a few too many beers. She was absolutely miserable and lay down on the floor on the side of the bed away from the door.
That was the last time they really talked. Hannah says Clay still tried to get her attention at school after the party, but she never responded to him.
After the party, she became extremely suicidal. That very night she started making her list. She started to realize how all the people and stories had worked together to put her where she was.
One of those people is on the next tape.
She says that person has already been on one tape, so Clay should skip it and mail the tapes to the next person once he's done with this one.
Clay knows who it is: Justin.
In the dark car, Tony asks Clay if he's okay. Clay tells Tony how much he misses Hannah and