It's noon at the newspaper offices of the Freeman's Journal (and the Evening Telegraph).
Myles Crawford is the editor of the paper. While professor MacHugh, Simon Dedalus, and Ned Lambert joke about Dan Dawson's overblown speech, Crawford pokes his head into their back office. MacHugh begins teasing him.
Crawford begins talking about the North Cork militia during the rebellion (a bit of very patchy history). Lambert passes out and whispers to O'Molloy that Crawford is half-mad on account of alcoholism. Lambert and Dedalus go to get a drink.
Bloom tries to get Crawford to let him make a phone call about Keyes's ad. MacHugh and Crawford make small talk about what's going to appear in the paper.
Crawford and MacHugh start to leave to go meet Lambert and Dedalus at the oval for a drink. On the way out, MacHugh leans over to O'Molloy and notes that Crawford's already pretty buzzed.
O'Molloy offers MacHugh a cigarette. He offers Lenehan one too, but only after he lights theirs. Crawford comes out and joins in the smoking session. Crawford, O'Molloy, and MacHugh joke about the Roman Empire and compare it to Britain.
When Stephen Dedalus enters, Crawford greets him. Stephen gives him Deasy's article on foot and mouth disease. The professor peeks over Dedalus's shoulder and asks why he's writing about the illness.
Stephen is embarrassed and explains that it's not his. Crawford goes on about Deasy's disagreeable late wife and tells Stephen that he is a widower.
Crawford scans the article, and begins to speak about the Irishman O'Donnell knocking out a Hungarian that tried to assassinate the Austrian emperor Franz Joseph, but MacHugh cuts him off.
Crawford stuffs Deasy's letter in his pocket and agrees to publish it. Lenehan finally tells his riddle, but it falls flat.
Crawford notes the gathering of talents in the room, "Law, the classics…" (7.310).
Crawford puts his hand on Stephen's shoulder and tries to recruit him for the paper. He wants Stephen to write something with "a bite in it" (7.321).
Crawford recalls Ignatius Gallaher, who made a name for himself reporting on the Phoenix Park murders, which he sent to The New York World. They all begin discussing their memory of the Phoenix Park murders and what happened to the culprits. Crawford recounts how Gallaher used an advertisement to explain the get-a-way route.
In the office, MacHugh takes a call from Bloom. He tells Crawford, but Crawford is distracted and tells MacHugh that Bloom can "go to hell" (7.350).
Crawford goes on about what a fine journalist Gallaher was and how hard it is to find anybody like him. They all agree that he was darn clever.
As they all head out to get a drink, O'Molloy stops Crawford to ask him for a loan.
Bloom returns and tries to get Crawford's attention. He tells him that Keyes will renew his ad, but wants to do it for two months instead of three. Crawford tells Bloom to tell Keyes that he can "kiss my arse" (7.496).
Bloom says he'll get the ad design lined up for Keyes, but Crawford is persistent: "He can kiss my royal Irish arse" (7.500).
Crawford turns to O'Molloy and apologizes, but says he won't be able to give him the loan. O'Molloy strides on silently.
Stephen continues with his story,("The Parable of the Plums") and MacHugh catches Crawford up on it.
In the story, Stephen notes that his two old women are so giddy they pull up their skirts. Crawford notes that he has to watch himself because they are in the archdiocese (which is, metaphorically speaking, omnipresent in Dublin).
At the end of story, Stephen laughs, but Crawford isn't quite sure he gets it. He asks what Stephen calls it. Stephen says, A Pisgah Sight of Palestine (vision that was granted Moses) or "The Parable of the Plums."
Episode 15: Circe
In "Circe," when Bloom tells everyone in his imagined court that he is a writer, Crawford appears to verify it.