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Texas EOC English 1: 2.4 Revision 166 Views


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00:00

Thank you We sneak in and here's your shmoop dooz

00:05

your brought to you by the laws of the land

00:07

because only fish care about the laws of the sea

00:11

Check the following passage Disenfranchise fallon's all those poor fallon's

00:16

You gotta be able to vote They're gonna vote for

00:19

oh belen booth politician All right Well which of these

00:25

changes would improve jordan's paper And here the potential answers

00:30

choices But do you know anything Anything All right Well

00:33

we have several very different options here So the only

00:36

thing to do is take them one by one and

00:38

see if they have anything useful to say Our gas

00:40

is Three of them do not But that's just a

00:42

hunch choice A would be an awesome thing to do

00:44

If our goal were to turn the whole paper into

00:46

gobbledygook The fourth paragraph is doing just fine where it

00:50

is ripping it out and slapping it on the end

00:53

would well totally disrupt the papers Flow and like serious

00:57

emcee jordan's paper gets picked when its flow is interrupted

01:01

Option b is also a really bad idea The final

01:04

paragraph would make a terrible introductory paragraph because the things

01:07

that mentions have to be introduced before they're discussed in

01:10

detail This is the kind of edit that makes readers

01:13

go huh Okay now we're down Two choices Dnc option

01:17

d says that jordan needs to ditch sentence twenty two

01:20

while see claims that sentence eleven is the issue Well

01:23

let's take a look At both these senses to see

01:25

which one the paper can do without Well after much

01:28

deliberation well after five seconds of deliberation we have decided

01:32

to eliminate choice D Sentence twenty two gives us some

01:35

important statistics on the numbers of disenfranchised felons in america

01:39

While sense eleven gives us some random vague info about

01:43

how all american citizens are affected by the law Joyce

01:46

c is correct Sense Elevens gotta go Sometimes dis in

01:50

french mint is okay Just imagine if we've given the 00:01:53.52 --> [endTime] other choices A vote

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