Sideways Stories From Wayside School Chapter 2

Mrs. Jewls

• Mrs. Jewls, who has a "terribly nice face" (2.1), arrives at Wayside School to take the place of former apple Mrs. Gorf.
• The children on the thirtieth floor have been without a teacher for three days since they never told anyone what happened to Mrs. Gorf. You'd think they'd be thrilled to have a lovely new teacher, but since everything at this school seems to be totally backwards, the kids are terrified: "[…] They were terribly afraid of nice teachers" (2.2). Of course they are.
• Mrs. Jewls, as it turns out, is equally terrified: "She had never taught cute children. She was horribly afraid of cute children" (2.3). Sounds about right for Wayside, right?
• Both kids and teacher forget all this terror though, once Mrs. Jewls mistakes her entire class for a group of monkeys, assuming that they were "much too cute to be children" (2.5).
• Mrs. Jewls refuses to believe that the children aren't monkeys, and it takes a lot of persuading to get her to change her mind. And once she changes her mind, she makes them take a test.
• Jason comments that he "liked it better when she thought we were monkeys" (2.37). Jason, we're with you—if only all teachers gave out bananas instead of tests.