Context

This line is spoken by Daniel Plainview, played by Daniel Day Lewis, in the film There Will Be Blood, directed by Paul Thomas Anderson (2007).

Daniel, a mean dude devoid of conscience and heart, is approached by Eli for help getting out of financial trouble. Let us set the stage for you: in the past, Daniel was purchasing land in California for oil production, which made him very rich. But there was a holdout who wouldn't sell to Daniel. Now the holdout is dead and Eli is offering to help Daniel buy the land. His idea is that Daniel gets the land he wants, Eli gets a broker's fee, and everybody is happy—not.

You see, there's been bad blood between Daniel and Eli for years and Daniel, transformed by alcohol from mean to violently enraged, points out to Eli (with degrading cruelty) that, like stealing a milkshake with a straw that reaches across the room, Daniel's already drained all the oil from that land so it's now worthless to Eli. Daniel then "strikes" (sorry) Eli with a bowling pin. Repeatedly. And kills him.

This scene raises a few questions: Is it ever okay to take stuff that doesn't belong to you? If it's under the ground and two farms away, is it okay to take?

While you ponder that, we'll also add that the movie director said the line is actually from a 1924 statement by Senator Albert Fall who explained drainage as "if you have a milkshake and I have a milkshake and my straw reaches across the room, I'll end up drinking your milkshake."

Drink in this clip.

Where you've heard it

You've heard this in fast food restaurants, when the kids are horsing around, not eating their deep-fried nuggets. After pleading and threatening discipline, the parent resorts to the classic "I drink your milkshake" threat. Continuing to be ignored, the parent realizes that "I take your iPad" gets a better response.

Additional Notable References

• Saturday Night Live parody
• Illustrated text
• Article on fracturing and trespassing laws in Texas
• Blog post on stealing competitors' clients

Pretentious Factor

If you were to drop this quote at a dinner party, would you get an in-unison "awww" or would everyone roll their eyes and never invite you back? Here it is, on a scale of 1-10.

This isn't so much pretentious as it is… well, rude. Like, did you even ask permission for a sip of our milkshake? Come on, man. You know strawberry is our favorite flavor. Next time, get your own.