Quote 1
He nodded sagely. "And what's more, I love Daisy too. Once in a while I go off on a spree and make a fool of myself, but I always come back, and in my heart I love her all the time." (7.251-252)
It's totally okay for Tom to have his little affairs, because he really loves Daisy. Yeah, we're so sure that excuse works for her.
Quote 2
"Self-control!" Repeated Tom incredulously. "I suppose the latest thing is to sit back and let Mr. Nobody from Nowhere make love to your wife. Well, if that's the idea you can count me out […] Nowadays people begin by sneering at family life and family institutions, and next they'll throw everything overboard and have intermarriage between black and white." (7.229)
Um, okay, Tom. (1) Pot, meet kettle. (2) We see just how important wealth isn't. All the money in the world can't make Gatsby "worth" Daisy.
P.S. This is dated and totally racist. In case you didn't catch that.
Quote 3
"I found out what your 'drug-stores' were." He turned to us and spoke rapidly. "He and this Wolfsheim bought up a lot of side-street drug-stores here and in Chicago and sold grain alcohol over the counter. That's one of his little stunts. I picked him for a bootlegger the first time I saw him, and I wasn't far wrong."
"What about it?" said Gatsby politely. "I guess your friend Walter Chase wasn't too proud to come in on it." (7.284-85)
When he's caught lying, Gatsby doesn't care. As he sees it, everyone is engaged in some kind of deception, including Tom's friends. But Tom has different standards—double standards.
Quote 4
He broke off defiantly. "What if I did tell him? That fellow had it coming to him. He threw dust into your eyes just like he did in Daisy's, but he was a tough one. He ran over Myrtle like you'd run over a dog and never even stopped his car."
There was nothing I could say, except the one unutterable fact that it wasn't true. (9.142-43)
Sometimes honesty isn't the best policy. Gatsby's dead, and Nick has to protect Daisy; he has to lie to keep her safe. Busted! Guess Nick isn't so honest after all. Or, is this actually the more honest and moral choice? Tricky.
Quote 5
"Did you give Nick a little heart-to-heart talk on the veranda?" demanded Tom suddenly.
"Did I?" She looked at me. "I can't seem to remember, but I think we talked about the Nordic race. Yes, I'm sure we did. It sort of crept up on us and first thing you know–"
"Don't believe everything you hear, Nick," he advised me. (1.137-143)
The first rule of marriage is: Don't talk about marriage. Tom is worried that Daisy's been airing their dirty laundry—which is its own form of betrayal.
Quote 6
"Self-control!" repeated Tom incredulously. "I suppose the latest thing is to sit back and let Mr. Nobody from Nowhere make love to your wife. Well, if that's the idea you can count me out […] Nowadays people begin by sneering at family life and family institutions, and next they'll throw everything overboard and have intermarriage between black and white."
Flushed with his impassioned gibberish, he saw himself standing alone on the last barrier of civilization. (7.222-230)
Uh-huh. Tom is definitely the last bulwark of family values. You know, values like abusing your wife, taking mistresses, and then callously ignoring their brutal deaths.
P.S. If ever a quote were going to date a book, this would be it. We just don't think this way anymore. And thank goodness for that.
Quote 7
"You're crazy!" he exploded. "I can't speak about what happened five years ago, because I didn't know Daisy then—and I'll be damned if I see how you got within a mile of her unless you brought the groceries to the back door. But all the rest of that's a God damned lie. Daisy loved me when she married me and she loves me now." (7.246)
Notice how Daisy's love is like a possession to Tom? He sees marriage as a system of ownership, and he's all about controlling access. Gatsby can bring groceries to the back door and drive her around, but he can't have anything more.
Quote 8
He nodded sagely. "And what's more, I love Daisy too. Once in a while I go off on a spree and make a fool of myself, but I always come back, and in my heart I love her all the time."
"You're revolting," said Daisy. She turned to me, and her voice, dropping an octave lower, filled the room with thrilling scorn: "Do you know why we left Chicago? I'm surprised that they didn't treat you to the story of that little spree." (7.251-252)
Tom expects a lot more from Daisy than he does from himself, but this was just par for the course in upper class marriages of the time (and a lot of time previously, too). Men got to play around; women got to produce heirs. It's a bargain.
Quote 9
"She's not leaving me!" Tom's words suddenly leaned down over Gatsby. "Certainly not for a common swindler who'd have to steal the ring he put on her finger."
"I won't stand this!" cried Daisy. "Oh, please let's get out." (7.275-281)
And one last proof that Tom sees marriage as an economic exchange: he's "bought" Daisy honestly, but Gatsby would have to buy her dishonestly. No word on what Daisy wants, of course.