Study Guide

Delirium Quotes

  • Love

    The deadliest of all deadly things: It kills you both when you have it and when you don't. (1.12)

    This is Lena's verdict on love. Don't you think this girl is a little too wrapped up in this romantic love business? What about other kinds of love—love between family, friends, strangers, etc.—that really seem to make the modern world go 'round?

    "I love children." (3.18)

    This is a lie Lena tells to deceive her evaluators into giving her a high rating, but it's not a very good one. After all, no one is supposed to love anyone or anything in this society. To us, that's a red flag. What kind of person or government would say that parents shouldn't even love their own kids?

    "You can't be happy unless you're unhappy sometimes, right?" (3.61)

    This is one of the last things Hana says to Lena before their first evaluations. You can't have anything without its opposite, when you think about it. Light and dark. Love and hate… which is why there's so little overt conflict in Delirium's Portland.

    Breathless; excited; waiting for the drop. (9.157)

    What could this drop be that Lena is waiting for? A fall? To fall... in... love?

    Most things, even the greatest movements on earth, have their beginning in something small. (9.169)

    We're not sure what Lena is foreshadowing here—maybe some future societal rebellion by the people beyond the fence—but it also sounds like many people's stories of the first time they met. Lena and Alex's relationship started with a dance. Well, it really started with Alex staring at Lena while she almost got trampled by cows. But that's not as romantic of a first date story.

    I'm just happy, a pure, bubbly feeling. (10.55)

    Yep, Lena's falling for Alex. And floating along atop a blissful, bubbly surf is a good way of describing her young romance. If falling in love felt like lying on top of a garbage heap, people probably wouldn't be so jazzed about it. Although, Alex and Lena did first talk to each other near some toxic waste. Hm...

    The disorientation, the distraction, the difficulty focusing—all classic Phase One signs of deliria. But I don't care. If pneumonia felt this good I'd stand out in the snow in the winter with bare feet and no coat on, or march into the hospital and kiss pneumonia patients. (15.21)

    Lena's caught the love bug, and she doesn't care. This is definitely the Romeo and Juliet kind of love, with a devil-may-care attitude toward any consequences.

    I know I belong with Alex. (18.23)

    Love lifts them up where they belong. ‎ It's amazing how Lena had no interest in boys at the beginning of the book, but once she's with Alex, she doesn't want anything else from life. Would she be this attached toward any boy who was her first love? Or is there really something special about Alex?

    This is what people are always talking about when they talk about God: this feeling, of being held and understood and protected. Feeling this way seems about as close to saying a prayer as you could get. (21.62)

    Love gets Lena closer to God, if there is one. Her beliefs on love may be clear, but her beliefs in a higher power are not. Maybe love is her higher power.

    Without love, there could also be no hate: without hate, no violence. Hate isn't the most dangerous thing [...] indifference is. (22.49)

    Here, Lena seems to be saying that nothing exists without its opposite. So if you create a world without love, then that world will be a peaceful one. The only thing is, Delirium seems to suggest, you can't actually create a world that's completely free of love. People need each other, people hate being told what they can and can't feel, and they will rebel. Love will find a way.

  • Fear

    For days afterward, they broadcast the image of the dead girl's face on television to remind us of the dangers of the deliria. (1.9)

    Ah, this is a textbook technique in any fear-mongering society. Here, the futuristic government of Delirium is engendering fear in the people by creating a bogey man the government can "protect" the people from: love.

    [Romeo and Juliet is] frightening: That's what I'm supposed to say. It's a cautionary tale, a warning about the dangers of the old world, before the cure. (4.45)

    Romeo and Juliet is a little scary in a way. If everyone acted as emotional and irrational as those two, we'd never get anything accomplished in this world. And it can be read as a cautionary tale, we think. But not as a dictum that all love should be abolished in the world.

    Someday we will all be saved. (5.12)

    Lena believes that her fear of love is fine and rational and good for everyone. She projects it onto everyone else, thinking they all want to be saved from the deliria too. There's kind of a religious connotation to the idea of being "saved" as well. Do you think Lena is right? Does everyone want to be saved, whether they say they do or not?

    Everyone is terrified that the deliria will somehow find its way into Portland on a large scale. Everyone wants to prevent an epidemic. (7.16)

    The fear of love is so strong in Delirium, we feel like World War Z could break out at any moment. Of course, we'd rather live through World War Z than everyone acting like Romeo and Juliet. Zombies are more predictable than people in love.

    [Hana] remind me of the animals we saw once on a class trip to the slaughterhouse. [...] Desperation. I'm really scared, then, truly terrified for her. (8.52)

    Lena says she's scared for Hana, but we think she's scared for herself. What is going to happen to Lena if Hana goes through with this party idea of hers? What about breaking the rules seems to terrify Lena so much?

    "You can't go on being so scared all the time." […] "I'm scared. And I'm right to be scared." (8.72-8.73)

    Hana and Lena come at the issue of fear from two opposite viewpoints. Hana thinks Lena should face her fear, because by overcoming her fear, she can be her "true self". Lena thinks her fear actually helps her—it keeps her from doing stupid, dangerous things. They both have valid points. Whose side are you on?

    A world without fear. Impossible. (9.70)

    Lena believes the world of the Invalids to be a world without fear. But everyone lives with fear, even the people who live outside the oppressive city's walls. The difference is that they're afraid of the elements, animals, starving to death, etc. Lena is afraid of saying the wrong thing in front of a boy, and getting beat up by the Regulators.

    I'm two seconds away from jumping up and running away. (10.34)

    Lena is so scared of embarrassing herself in front of Alex, she's contemplating literally running away from him. Kind of like Anna Faris in Scary Movie.

    "Even when you haven't done anything wrong, it still makes you jumpy." (13.31)

    Everyone in Lena's world pretty much lives like they have a cop on their tail. Except in Lena's world, that cop is likely to rear end you, beat you, and take all of your stuff. We said this is dystopian literature, right?

    At those times, and only for a few seconds, I'm still afraid of [Alex], still hear the world /Invalid/ drumming in my ear. (16.16)

    Girls (and boys), don't take after Lena in this case. Or in many cases, really. But you definitely should not be afraid of your boyfriend. We think Lena is really afraid of what Alex represents to her, though: the big, scary, seemingly rule-less outside world.

  • Lies and Deceit

    "They want to know about your personality, yes, but the more generalized your answers the better chance you have of being considered for a variety of positions." (3.3)

    Basically, be yourself… as long as yourself is the most boring person imaginable. Is this what you think life in a government-controlled society would be like? Is it true that the more rules there are, the more people start acting and sounding same?

    Beyond that is the open ocean—and beyond that, all the crumbling countries and cities ruined by the disease. (3.8)

    We have no idea if this is the truth—if there are countries around the world destroyed by the deliria—or if it's just government propaganda. Lena believes anything she's told, but as far we know, the U.S. might be the only country that has banned love.

    It's extremely unusual for people to dream once they've been cured. (5.27)

    Is this true, or do people just not talk about their dreams once they've been cured? How effective is this love cure, really? And do you think people need the idea of love in order to dream? What about nightmares? Where do they come from?

    "Don't be an idiot. If it was on the news, it definitely isn't true." (5.45)

    Not only is this an apt assessment of the media in Lena's time, it's also a funny line because it could kind of be true in our own society. What do you think? Which news sources do you trust, and which do you think are full of it?

    I've learned to get really good at this—say one thing when I'm thinking something else, act like I'm listening when I'm not. (5.52)

    In other words, Lena is great at pretending to be someone she's not… except in situations where it counts, like at the evaluation. In that instance, she's shockingly honest. Why do you think that is?

    "We weren't breaking in. [...] We got lost." (5.92)

    Unlike Lena, who thinks she's the best liar of all time (yet freezes when it counts), Hana is pretty good at talking herself out of dicey situations. Like this one with Alex the security guard. Sure, you were just lost, Hana. That's all.

    "We've never met. I'm sure I would remember." (5.103)

    Alex is pretty good at lying too. He even turns this lie into a flirtatious comment. Very suave there, bro.

    I never knew I could lie to my aunt—I never knew I could lie, period. (6.77)

    All that subtle deceit Lena thinks she's so good at has evolved into out-and-out lying. What do you think prompted the change? Is it the deliria?

    "Smoke and mirrors, all of it," Alex says, waving his hand vaguely. I assume he means Portland, the laws, maybe all of the USA. (16.34)

    The fact that 99.9% of Portland's citizens obey the rules without question is kind of magical. Alex's comparison of this rule-abiding to smoke and mirrors reinforces that feeling of magic. The thing is, once citizens know how the trick of fear-mongering is done, the illusion isn't as strong. Once Lena starts to question the lies her government has told her about the Wilds, about love, and more, they quickly fall apart.

    In that second it really hits me how deep and complex the lies are, how they run through Portland like sewers, backing up into everything, filling the city with stench: the whole city built and constructed within a perimeter of lies. (16.71)

    This analogy is similar to the smoke and mirrors one, except it makes us picture Portland as a rickety tower of lies. When Lena pulls the lowest block out of that tower, the whole thing collapses.

  • Madness

    The most dangerous sicknesses are those that make us believe we are well. (1.1)

    Lena is describing the deliria here, but she could be describing any sort of mental illness that sometimes gives people feelings of extreme joy and extreme despair. Is that what love is: a mental illness?

    People back then named other diseases—stress, heart disease, anxiety, depression, hypertension, insomnia, bipolar disorder—never realizing that these were, in fact, only symptoms that in the majority of cases could be traced back to the effects of amor deliria nervosa. (1.7)

    Boy, they've managed to simplify a lot of complicated diseases in Lena's world. Does their oversimplification have any validity to it, or is this just a way to scare people into being afraid of love?

    I must be crazy, zooming around in the half dark just to meet up with some guy on the beach. (6.84)

    Meeting up with a guy you've met once, in an isolated location, might not be "crazy," but it's definitely not a very safe idea. We don't recommend it.

    I tell myself I must have gone temporarily insane: brain scramble, from running in the heat. (7.18)

    Because Lena has been taught that love is crazy, she starts to equate the nervous fluttering in her stomach that she feels when she thinks about Alex with bonafide mental illness.

    We must have looked completely crazy. [...] "You looked happy." (9.140, 9.142)

    This is an interesting comparison. Lena thinks she looks crazy when, to an outside observer, she looks happy. Perhaps the time she spent with her so-called crazy mother, who often seemed happy, made her equate happiness with madness.

    It's like there's a filter set up in my brain, except instead of making things better, it twists everything around so what comes out of my mouth is totally wrong, totally different from what I was thinking. (10.18)

    Yeah, the love/lust combo Lena feels toward Alex is totally making her crazy. It's a normal kind of crazy, but Lena doesn't take any kind of crazy lightly. Chill out, girl. It's just a crush. Right?

    It took four scientists and several needles full of tranquilizer before [Rachel] would submit. (11.2)

    Yikes. These kinds of procedures make us think of the mental health institutions of the past... and people in straightjackets.

    I check constantly for symptoms of the disease. (11.12)

    Lena's paranoia about love seems to make her crazier than the disease itself.

    "She left all that. She gave it up—for, for that /thing./ Love. /Amor deliria nervosa/—whatever you want to call it. She gave /me/ up." (20.64)

    Lena's mother fits the profile of a person with mental illness. We're not sure which mental illness—bipolar, most likely—but there's more to this "love as a disease" thing than Lena realizes. Clearly, her mom didn't want to give Lena up—she actually loved Lena, and wasn't shy about saying so.

    The Crypts also serves as Portland's mental institution and [...] despite the cure we have our share of crazies just like anywhere else. (21.23)

    Despite having a mother who is clearly mentally ill, Lena isn't too sensitive to the struggles of people with psychological disorders. Just like she tries to shrug off her mom because she abandons her, she uses the word "crazies" two times in this paragraph to dismiss those lovelorn souls who rot away in the Crypts.

  • Lust

    I've never touched a boy, of course—physical contact between uncureds of opposite sex is forbidden. (2.29)

    Sounds like this cure is less a cure for love and more a cure for lust. It's possible to love someone without touching them, right?

    I've never been this close to a boy before. I feel like fainting and running all at the same time. But I can't move. (5.142)

    We have to wonder if Lena would feel this way about Alex if he was still pretending to not know who she was. Maybe it's the fact that he's attracted to her that really gets her motor going.

    Not just people. Boy. And girls. [...] Boys and girls talking. Boys and girls laughing. Boys and girls sharing sips from the same cup. All of a sudden, I think I might faint. (9.42)

    This is a hormone-fueled party, and all the sexual tension in the air is making Lena dizzy. We wonder if she would have the same feelings if she were "cured" or if, as a cured, she would just avoid the part to begin with.

    I instantly recognize the voice. [...] Everything freezes. The blood stops flowing in my veins. My breath stops coming. (9.82)

    Dang, Alex has quite the effect on Lena. Normally lust makes people all hot and sweaty, but Lena goes into a total chill. When her government-instilled fear combines with her lust, she is paralyzed.

    This is how it starts. Phase One: preoccupation; difficulty focusing; dry mouth; perspiration, sweaty palms; dizziness and disorientation. (9.147)

    Here, Lena is reciting from memory the symptoms of amor deliria nervosa as though it's malaria. But really, she's describing the normal physiological symptoms of attraction. In other words, she's so excited, she just can't hide it.

    Flirting. A dirty word. (9.152)

    Jeez. For Lena, the fact that the government has banned love just makes her want it more. What's the lesson here, do you think?

    I've never in my whole life seen a guy without a shirt on [...] now I can't stop staring. (13.46, 13.47)

    Let's put this into context, shall we? Lena just saw two people get killed right in front of her, and a dog took a giant bite out of her leg. But all she can think about is Alex's chest. Ladies and gentleman: this is lust. Try to control yourselves, please.

    Then we're kissing. [...] This is like music or dancing but better than both. (14.94)

    No wonder the government bans music and dancing. Those are gateway drugs to smooching, apparently.

    This is what I want. This is the only thing I've ever wanted. (14.96)

    Lena kissed a boy and she likes it. She really likes it. In fact, it's basically all she can think about for the rest of the book. It almost makes us wish she did have the cure, because then she might shut up about kissing Alex. But if her society didn't try so hard to stamp out love, do you think Lena would feel as strongly about it?

    When they go to bury us, we'll be so melted together and entwined they won't be able to separate the bodies; pieces of him will go with me, and pieces of me will go with him. (27.78)

    Okay, burning to death in a motorcycle accident doesn't sound romantic to anyone but Lena. And maybe Romeo and Juliet. C'mon, Lena, no guy is worth literally dying for.

  • Dissatisfaction

    I've never been comfortable with my body like Hana. (5.46)

    Early on, we see how Lena is not only insecure, she's comparing herself to others in an unfavorable light. This is a one-way ticket to Low Self-Esteemville… on the express train.

    I'm sure to [Alex] I was only a blurry, in-between face, easy to forget. [...] Just plain, like a thousand other faces you would see on the street. (6.126)

    Lena is extremely insecure about her appearance, and this dissatisfaction has overshadowed the fact that Alex has been flirting with her for almost the entire conversation. See what you miss when you're super worried about yourself?

    "I'm sick of that [Lena]. [...] Sick of always checking your back, looking behind you, watching what you say." (8.48)

    Lena isn't the only one experiencing some dissatisfaction in her friendship with Hana. Hana feels like she's always walking on eggshells because of all Lena's issues—trust issues, fear issues, self-image issues. This isn't exactly the healthiest friendship in the book.

    I don't even really know Alex, and there's an impassable divide between us, but the idea upsets me anyway. (10.33)

    Lena is beating herself up for talking too much about herself to Alex. For someone who has never had a conversation with a member of the opposite sex, much less a relationship, she puts a lot of pressure on herself to be perfect. Take a chill pill, girl.

    I know the past will drag you backward and down, have you snatching at whispers of wind and the gibberish of trees rubbing together, trying to decipher some code, trying to piece together what was broken. (11.10)

    Lena is so filled with regrets that just the very concept of the past makes her depressed. No wonder she looks forward to the cure, and to forgetting.

    "Why? It's not like you'll even /have/ a budget." I don't mean to sound bitter but there it is, the difference in our futures cutting between us again. (12.45)

    Well, it's not so much the difference between their futures coming between Lena and Hana as much as Lena's attitude toward them. She's grown a little depressed with being a have-not. She wants everything that Hana has.

    She only skimmed a hand over my head as she came through the door. (13.5)

    If Lena is so disappointed with the lack of affection she receives from others, why is she so eager to have her own deliria cured?

    "Are you sure that being like everybody else will make you happy?" (14.91)

    Alex is trying to point out how irrational Lena's desire to be like everyone else is. She's so dissatisfied with being different that she doesn't realize being the same wouldn't make her feel any better. It might make her feel worse.

    Time jumps. It leaps. It pours away like water through fingers. (16.32)

    Lena is very happy with Alex. She's not happy with the way that time flies when she's with him. You know, time flies when you're having fun and all that.

    I actually feel sorry for Carol. I'm only seventeen years old, and I already know something she doesn't know: I know that life isn't life if you just float through it.

    Aunt Carol lives a life of dissatisfaction. A loveless marriage. Stupid kids she doesn't even like. But she does just float through it. Is that any kind of life? Does Lena have a point here?

  • Passivity

    Many people are afraid of the procedure. Some people even resist. But I'm not afraid. I can't wait. (1.2)

    This is one of the first lines in the book, and it tells us a few things. Even though the love cure has been around for a while, some people don't blindly give into it. Lena, however, is one of the dull sheep that is ready to be led wherever the government wants her to go.

    "Every choice is limited," I snap. "That's life." (3.50)

    Lena is totally fine with all of the regulations the government has imposed upon her life. No choices? No problem. Her middle name might as well be Doormat.

    I'm glad the choice is made for us. I'm glad I don't have to choose—but more than that, I'm glad I don't have to make someone else choose me. (4.10)

    This line illustrates why some people just sit back and let their rights be taken away: it's easy to do nothing. And people love easy. This line also illustrates Lena's biggest enemy in Delirium: herself. If Lena got some self-esteem, she might be in a better place to make decisions about her future. Just saying.

    It's so strange how life works: You want something and you wait and wait [...] then it happens and it's over and all you want to do is curl back up in that moment before things changed. (5.43)

    Lena is surprisingly resistant to change, even when that change involves something she she wants. She prefers to maintain the status quo at all costs.

    I comfort myself by thinking that in less than two months this will seem like nothing to me. All of it will fall away and I'll rise up new and free. (8.87)

    Lena is much more comfortable going with the flow at this point in the book… and that flow is leading her right toward a love lobotomy. Swim upstream, girl. Swim.

    I wish I [...] could wake up tomorrow and ride over to Hana's house, could lie out at Eastern Prom with her and complain how boring summers are, like we always do. Could believe that nothing had changed. (9.74)

    Instead of going to parties, Lena would rather complain about how boring summer is with Hana. Why is summer so boring? Not because Portland is boring. Because passive Lena is super boring and doesn't want to do anything fun.

    Sometimes I feel like if you just watch things, just sit still and let the world exist in front of you—sometimes I swear that just for a second time freezes and the world pauses in its tilt. (10.21)

    This is a nice sentiment, and it explains why Lena holds onto her passivity so much. There is a certain kind of beauty to just watching your life go by, when you think about it this way.

    I just have to believe that Alex will come and rescue me—like in one of the fairy tales he told me about [...] where the prince springs a princess from a locked tower. (27.5)

    This is Lena's grand escape plan: wait for a guy to save her. We'll be eagerly awaiting Lena's Disney Princess doll in stores for the holidays.

    I'd rather die loving Alex than live without him. (27.31)

    Lena's Plan A: Alex saves her. Lena's Plan B: she dies. She's not going to try to escape on her own. What a wuss.

    "When I say go, you drive. And when I say jump, you jump." (27.97)

    Lena does everything Alex tells her to do. We're surprised she doesn't ask him "how high?" She's learned to question her society in this book… but will she ever learn to question Alex?

  • Appearances

    [Hana is] absolutely gorgeous. (3.6)

    It's telling that this is the first thing Lena reports about Hana. By the end of the book, we're still not quite sure why they're best buds, but at least we know she's gorgeous. Unlike Lena. And this matters because…?

    I'm not ugly, but I'm not pretty, either. Everything is in-between. (3.6)

    Lena follows up her assessment of Hana's show-stopping looks with a not-so-glowing review of her own. Lena seems to apply her average looks to her personality, which she also describes as average and unloveable. Why is Lena so down on herself? Do you think that Lena is an accurate assessor of her own potential?

    [Alex isn't] like any guard I've ever seen—at least not the typical guards [...] fat and scowly and old. (5.97)

    Lena seems to think that guards exist for her viewing pleasure. Thankfully, Alex has come along to be all studly in his guard uniform.

    "I was kidding. You don't exactly seem like terrorists." (5.118)

    This is funny on two levels. One: a ditzy teenage girl would actually be the perfect cover for a terrorist. Two: Alex is a sympathizer, what Lena's government views as a terrorist, and yet he doesn't exactly fit the profile either. He's all young and dreamy and seemingly law-abiding and stuff.

    For once, [Hana] doesn't look pretty and in control. She looks pale and unhappy, and her expression reminds me of something, but I can't place it right away. (8.49)

    Hm, could her unhappiness remind you of what you see when you look in the mirror, Lena? We think so.

    I'm struck dumb by the beauty of it [...] a sea of people, writhing and dancing in the light. (9.35)

    Beauty is the number one thing that Lena values in a person, so it's no surprise that this is what she instantly picks out about the party. It's all looks, looks, looks for this girl.

    Hana made fun of [Angelica Marston] for the way she wore her uniform. It was always perfectly pressed and spotless, the collar of her button-down turned down exactly, her skirt hitting exactly at the knee. (12.69)

    Why would Hana make fun of a girl for these reasons? Does she have the perfection that Hana lacks and wants?

    Then he breathes, "Beautiful," and when his eyes meet mine I know that he really, truly means it. [...] I believe what Alex said. I am beautiful. (16.28-16.29)

    Lena doesn't believe she's beautiful until Alex says she is. Now that Alex is presumed dead at the end of the book, do you think Lena still believes she's beautiful, without a boy to reaffirm this belief?

    [Brian Scharff] is impressively short, for a guy—and so thin I'm worried about breaking his wrist bone when we shake. (19.61)

    This is the opening volley in Lena's private barrage of criticism toward Brian Scharff for not living up to Alex's perfection. Is her hatred of him a result of her newfound distaste for the government's matching system, or is this just her shallow nature swimming to the surface?

    This guard is actually normal-sized—skinny, even, with acne pockmarks and hair that reminds me of overcooked spaghetti. (22.8)

    Again, Lena thinks the guards should be judged like the contestants on Top Model. She'll continue to go on about Thomas's crooked yellow teeth and bad complexion. Maybe the next cure the U.S. will develop is a cure for ugliness, because it sure seems to breed a lot of discontent. In Lena, at least. Although if Lena is as average as she says she is, she might be on the receiving end of it herself.

  • Betrayal

    Hana has been morphing into a stranger. (8.41)

    Hana is totally open and honest with Lena about how she feels—she likes music and boys. And she's not ashamed of it. But since this all that stuff scares Lena, Lena sees Hana's forthrightness as a betrayal.

    Everyone you trust, everyone you think you can count on, will eventually disappoint you. (8.43)

    Dang, talk about trust issues. Lena's mother's suicide (and her government's creepy totalitarianism) has left her unable to trust people. She always expects the worst.

    I see that Hana is a snake—has been waiting a long time to say this to me. (8.81)

    Lena's gone a little bit off the deep end with this. None of her friends have ever done her wrong, so it's strange that she's so angry at Hana for being frank with Lena about her mom. Maybe this is the deliria talking...

    All the happiest moments of my childhood were a lie. They were all wrong and unsafe and illegal. They were freakish. (9.8)

    Up until this point in Lena's life, she always thought she had a happy childhood. However, the more Lena retreats inside herself, the more she sees her mother's loving treatment of her as a betrayal. That's how you know Delirium's Portland is totally backwards: a happy childhood somehow becomes a bad thing.

    Is it possible that all this time I've been lied to my whole life, studying for tests, taking long runs with Hana—and this other world just existed, running alongside and underneath mine, alive, ready to sneak out of the shadows and alleyways as soon as the sun goes down? (9.69)

    This revelation is kind of a typical coming-of-age trope. Waking up one day and feeling like everything you believed in as a kid was a lie is actually totally normal. You know, Santa Claus. The Muppets. And so on. But in Lena's world, what she believed in included world peace and the government. Nothing is sacred, you see.

    "I'm not who you think I am." (10.72)

    These seven words are the last thing Lena wants to hear from Alex. She's so insecure with herself, she's been practically counting down the days until Alex betrays her. So when he tells her this, she runs away without giving him any opportunity to explain himself.

    "You're just going to walk by me now?" (12.2)

    Lena doesn't have a monopoly on betrayal, even though she sure acts like it. Looking at things from the other side of the story, we see that Hana confessed her true feelings to Lena. And what did her best friend do? Yell at her and storm out. Um, yeah, we'd feel a little betrayed too.

    Segregation has it all wrong. We should be protected from the people who will leave us in the end, from all the people who will disappear or forget us. (12.48)

    Once again, we see why Lena is a champion of the love cure: safety. This time, it's safety from feeling betrayed by a friend.

    I don't know who I am anymore, or where I belong. (18.22)

    Lena is upset because her whole history has been a lie. "The blitz" wasn't just some big terraforming project; it killed millions of people. Even though Lena had no hand it, nor knew any of the people involved, she still feels betrayed. And we understand that.

    That's how I feel now, again. Lost and found and lost again, all at once. (23.4)

    It seems that Lena's mother just can't win. She betrayed Lena by giving her a happy childhood. Then she betrayed Lena by committing suicide. Then she betrayed Lena by not actually committing suicide. And finally, she betrayed Lena by escaping from the mental institution and not contacting her. If Lena ever meets her mother, will she forgive her for these betrayals, do you think?