Bella’s wish to be changed into a vampire has become a constant point of contention between her and Edward. She puts it before anything else.
My eyes dark… pallid skin… I might even pass for a vampire now… But I was not beautiful and I probably looked closer to a zombie. (5.25)
A big part of becoming a vampire for Bella is to be beautiful.
Jacob had grown into some of his potential in the last eight months… the tendons and veins had become prominent under the red-brown skins of his arms, his hands. His face… had hardened… the planes of his cheekbones sharper… all childish roundness gone. (5.82)
Bella (unwittingly) describes one of the first symptoms of Jacob’s transformation into a werewolf: physical maturity.
Bella laughs for the first time in months. "I felt so weightless that I laughed again, just to make the feeling last longer." (6.47)
Bella experiences an emotional transformation through Jacob’s presence.
The wolf closest to me, the reddish brown one, turned its head… It gazed at me… the deep eyes seeming too intelligent for a wild animal. As it stared at me, I suddenly thought of Jacob. (10.174-176)
Although Jacob has transformed, his essence or identity still lives within his werewolf body.
Jacob had changed radically in the last weeks since I’d seen him… his beautiful hair… was cropped quite short… his face… hardened… aged. His neck and his shoulders were… thicker… His hands… looked enormous… his expression unrecognizable. The open friendly smile was gone… the warmth in his dark eyes altered to a brooding resentment… (11.114-115)
Bella realizes that Jacob has lost his innocence. He has aged, both physically and emotionally. What might explain his emotional change?
[Jacob to Bella:] "When I… changed, it was the most… horrible, the most terrifying thing I’ve ever been through… there were voices there, in my head, telling me what had happened and what I had to do. That kept me from losing my mind." (13.224)
At first Jacob experienced his change as terrifying, but then the voices in his head told him that he didn’t have to be afraid, because he’d met his calling and he accepted it.
Paul seemed to fall forward vibrating violently. Halfway to the ground, there was a loud ripping noise, and the boy exploded. (14.19)
It’s the common saying, "I’m going to explode of anger," transformed into a supernatural, visual representation.
[Jacob to Bella:] "The hardest part is feeling…out of control," he said slowly. "Feeling like I can’t be sure of myself – like maybe you shouldn’t be around me… nobody should." (15.30)
It seems as if all transformations in the story (supernatural and emotional) involves a loss of control. Can you think of specific instances of each?
[Alice to Bella:] "I’m debating whether to just change you myself." (19.113)
Alice wants to turn Bella into a vampire, but is unsure if she has the self-restraint to bite Bella without killing her.