Orange Is the New Black Chapter 13

Thirty-five and Still Alive

• The prison bans cigarettes and has a shakedown looking for contraband.
• Shortly after, there's the prison Job Fair. It pretty much plays out exactly like the one on the television show: ultimately a complete waste of time.
• The whole Martha scandal is drawing a lot of attention to Danbury. People magazine calls them "the scum of the earth" (13.34), offending long-time reader Annette. 
• Also, a Hartford Courant reporter speaks to an ex-prisoner who acts like Danbury was the Four Seasons.
• Piper befriends Vanessa and enjoys watching Walking Tall, starring the Rock, whom Piper thinks will someday be president.
• Seriously (13.55).
• And then it's her birthday.
• Pop gives her handmade slippers, and she gets tons of cards and letters and, most importantly, chocolate.