Oh good, it's you Judd. We're glad you came by—we have a few things we wanted to talk to you about.
So we read your book, Judd. It's really good! You should really try your hand at stand-up-comedy! There's just one little thing: you're a bit of an unreliable narrator.
Come on, Judd, don't storm off—let us explain. There's this concept in literature called the "unreliable narrator." Typically, an unreliable narrator is both telling the story and involved as a character. Sound familiar?
As you might imagine, this double duty causes the narrator to skew the events of the novel a bit. Oh, nothing malicious—it's just that all of us view situations differently based on how they affect us.
Let's give you a few examples. Your interactions with Jen paint her in a harshly negative light. And yes, we know that she cheated on you, but wouldn't you say that such a huge, life-changing event might cloud your judgment?
Or think about how you bemoan the worldwide shortage of "happy, well-adjusted women" (43.92). Would anybody in the known universe describe you, Judd, as happy and well-adjusted?
Again, Judd, we want you to know that we're not criticizing you for it. In fact, that's why we love your book so much! It's impossible to separate the events that are happening from the way that you're telling them—and we wouldn't have it any other way.
All we're asking is that you understand where we're coming from. Just don't be mad at us—we know how you Foxman boys like to settle your disputes.