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Just because Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind isn't a horror movie, that doesn't mean it isn't scary. Joel is forced to deal with some difficult things inside of his own mind, but it's not just in his memories that Joel is afraid. He's also afraid when he meets Clem again; he's afraid to make eye contact, afraid to start a relationship, and just as afraid to give up the past. But that's kind of the point, really: relationships are scary. Life is scary. None of it is easy. But will running away and erasing everything painful make it any better?
If Joel weren't so afraid, he never would have had the Lacuna procedure done. Fear makes him an escapist.
Joel's fears of intimacy are only seen post-procedure and are actually a product of the emotional trauma he experienced from losing Clem. Even though he can't remember it, the emotional core of the memory still exists.