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Case description: Someone called a lifeguard—and then the lifeguard called the police—when they heard that Nun had been in the water since creation began.
Case status: Neither the lifeguard nor the police were able to locate Nun, because not only had he not drowned, he is the water itself. The police considered filing a charge of a false report against the person who called the lifeguard, but then decided no harm had been done, and maybe he didn't know any better.