The Odyssey Steaminess Rating

Exactly how steamy is this story?

PG-13

Hate the game, not the player: Odysseus is a serious ladies man. Seven whole years with Kalypso? It's distinctly possible that Odysseus spent more years with her than he did with his wife Penelope to begin with. Don't forget Circe, who wanted Odysseus so badly that she reversed all her magic to get him. Nausikaa also has a crush on our hero, but he doesn't seem too interested (she's probably a little too young and human for his taste). And then there's the super-suggestive reunion with lovely Penelope.

Still, we never actually see anything—so we'll go with PG-13. Barely.