OK, so Guenevere is the hottest woman in the Arthurian world, and she's been accused of knocking boots with her husband's best friend, Launcelot. That sounds pretty steamy, but the sexiest scene in the poem is when Guenevere and Launcelot sort of accidentally smooch in the garden. The bedroom scene, Guenevere assures us, is totally innocent – they were "like children," or so she says. Whatever you might think of Guenevere's honesty about that, the poem is pretty tame. Really, "The Defence of Guenevere" has nothing on Breaking Dawn, which has a PG-13 movie rating.