Behold my judges, then the cloths were brought; While I was dizzied thus, old thoughts would crowd,
"Belonging to the time ere I was bought By Arthur's great name and his little love; Must I give up for ever then, I thought,
"That which I deemed would ever round me move Glorifying all things; for a little word, Scarce ever meant at all, must I now prove
"Stone-cold for ever? Pray you, does the Lord Will that all folks should be quite happy and good? I love God now a little, if this cord
"Were broken, once for all what striving could Make me love anything in earth or heaven?
Now the speaker speaks to her "judges" again directly. (Remember, she's standing in front of a room full of "knights and lords" [line 1], defending herself at her trial.)
She says this was the moment when "the cloths were brought."
She's referring to that earlier analogy she made in lines 16-41, when she asked the judges to imagine that they were about to die and were forced to choose between two cloths – one that represented heaven, and one that represented hell.
So this was it, she says: when she was all depressed in the months after Launcelot's arrival, this was the moment of choice for her.
She says she was "dizzied" at this time. But with what? Depression? Love? Is she making excuses or just explaining how she felt at the time?
She says that at around this time, she kept remembering how she used to feel before she was "bought." That doesn't really sound like a nice way of describing her marriage to King Arthur, does it?
Apparently she and her husband, King Arthur, were never in love. She allowed herself to be "bought" by his wealth and position as king.
So in the months after Launcelot's arrival, she asked herself if she really had to give up "that" thing that would always "glorify all things."
She doesn't say what "that" is, though – does she mean true love? Happiness?
She wondered whether "the Lord" actually wanted people to be both "happy and good."
She says she loves God a little but wonders what would happen if that "cord" were broken.
Does the "cord" she's referring to mean her love of God? Her life? Her desire for happiness, which she seems to believe God wants for everyone?