- After breakfast, Mr. Collins goes over to Longbourn and asks to "speak to Elizabeth alone."
- That's code for "I'm going to propose to your daughter now."
- So, Mrs. Bennet clears her other daughters out of the room. Fast.
- Mr. Collins gets down to business, proposing in a, well, businesslike manner.
- He points out his extreme thoughtfulness in proposing to a Bennet girl because he's going to inherit their house one day.
- He also points out that Elizabeth is poor and that he is generous.
- Elizabeth tells him, Thanks, but no thanks.
- Mr. Collins says, I get it! You really mean "ask me again later."
- Elizabeth responds, No, I really mean "no."
- Before she can sprint out of the room, Mr. Collins tells her that he understands feminine behavior, and he'll propose again soon.
- Mr. Collins details his qualifications as a husband (there aren't many) and concludes by telling Elizabeth that he, again, doesn't believe her refusal is genuine. He thinks she's being an "elegant female."
- In polite nineteenth-century British terms, Elizabeth tells him to get lost.
- Mr. Collins calls her charming and says that she'll accept him after her parents pressure her.
- Oh you guys, it's so romantic! Not.