The Bible: 1 Chronicles
Recommendation
Want a study guide too?
The first part of the Bible chronicles the senseless evils of...census conducting. Yes, really. Check out the video to learn more.
Language | English Language |
Literature | The Bible |
Transcript
give you the scoop on the first book of chronicles
If you've been following along you may realize that you've
seen this all before One chronicles is pretty much a
recap of the history of israel from adam all the
way teo you know in the solomon proving that even
in biblical times there were no new ideas Anyway the
israel lights had just been released from their babylonian exile
which happened after the persians took power They were going
home and they needed to regain their heritage They needed
stories from their great pass to get them going again
They needed teo stop at a seven eleven and load
up on snacks for the road You know some manna
stuff So one chronicles begins with genealogies nine whole chapters
of them and then tells the story of king david
it's a bit whitewash though none of that messy groups
got another man's wife pregnant and then had him killed
L oh well hash tag Yolo stuff Yeah David becomes
king after the death of saul the first king of
israel david spends most of his time Is king fighting
the enemies of israel and turns out he's really good
at it Philistine xhm oa bites ammonites and even ara
means none of them stand a chance against king david
Are you starting to see why this might be a
good story for a people who have been exiled for
generations in glory days galore david continues winning battles and
even brings the ark of the covenant to jerusalem before
george lucas takes it for a movie at first is
placed in a tent which we hope got some pretty
stellar yelp reviews but then david starts to feel guilty
he's like i have this awesome house but the aren't
just has a little tent and god is like chill
dude The tent has five stars on yelp free wifi
and a continental breakfast before ten a m also it's
totally okay for now because one of your sons will
eventually build a temple for the ark so things are
going smoothly for david Any israel light's a little too
smoothly And there's One thing we know will disrupt peace
and quiet It's a plague No not a plague huh
Maybe famine still know How about abba announcing a reunion
tour All right strike three All right So what did
david do to get got all riled up Well hold
onto your seats because this is a doozy He conducted
a census Yep Serious A census you know How old
are you How much money do you make What do
you think you pay in taxes this year That senses
and god was not happy with david So he offers
him and choice of punishments Three years of famine three
months of foreign attacks for three days of wrath and
pestilence Well david decides to go with the short and
sweet and god plagues the country for three days Seventy
thousand people die david's Like now i gotta take a
new census and then has to immediately send a thousand
j k's to god Not a humor full guy So
david beg forgiveness from god and build an altar for
him He also buys got a snickers bar just in
case he was you know angry or something Yeah god
relents the plagues go away and david decides he really
doesn't need to know how many people are in his
kingdom after all since this bi dan so after all
the census nonsense is done david starts to gather money
and materials to build the temple but he won't be
building it God dropped him a line saying he can't
build it because he has so much blood on his
hands what with fighting all the time you know but
god's like your son is going to be way calmer
and never take a census so he can build the
temple While the last thing that david does before giving
over the crown to solomon is to tell him that
being faithful that god is the most important thing he
could do is king and too seriously never ever take
a census unless he's completely census lists and god chimes
in also steer clear of terrible puns just my two
census and presumably he and david shared an awesome air
five anyway solomon comes to power with nary a pun
to be heard and the first book of chronicles is
over Join me next time for the second book of
chronicles Until then i'm cecil b de shmoop and this
has been it's not too late to go back to
law school Look at your sister She picked such a 00:04:40.568 --> [endTime] stable career Yeah right mom sitio