The Odyssey Summary

Odysseus should have checked out How to Return Home from War for Dummies. Step One: Do not mess with the son of a god. Actually, no need to read on—this act will come back to haunt you for...oh, say, 10 years.

AuthorHomer - Homer
FormPoem
LanguageEnglish Language
LiteratureWorld Literature
PoetryEpic Poem
ThemesFamily
Fate and Free Will
Justice and Judgement
Lies and Deceit
Loyalty
Perseverance
Pride
Principles
Suffering
Tradition and Customs

Transcript

00:27

However, my men and I were captured by a Cyclops.

00:30

Dude only had one eye so, once we put that out, it was pretty easy to get away from him.

00:36

But then I did something really, really stupid. I told him my name. Yelled it at him, actually,

00:42

in kind of a taunting way, as I sailed away on my ship. Did I mention that this was not

00:48

a smart thing to do?

00:49

Turns out that the Cyclops’ dad was Poseidon. He complained about my blinding him to his

00:55

pops, and Poseidon promptly cursed me to wander about on my ship for ten years. Oops.

01:00

A decade sailing around the ocean is a long time, but boy, did we meet some interesting

01:05

people on our trip. First, there was Aeolus<<ay-oh-liss>>, who was kind enough to give me a giant whoopee

01:10

cushion that could have blown me back to Ithaca.

01:13

Unfortunately, my idiot crew members sat on the thing while I slept.

01:18

Then we met some cannibals. That didn't end well.

01:22

Then, we met Circe<<sir-sea>>. Nice girl, but we got off on the wrong foot when she

01:26

turned half of my men into pigs.

01:28

Hermes, the god, not the luxury brand, gave me a drug that helped me resist Circe's wiles.

01:37

She ultimately agreed to turn my crew members back into men, if I would love her. Sounded

01:42

like a deal to me, but please don't tell Penelope. After a year spent chillin' with Circe, my

01:48

men and I sailed to the edge of the world...

01:50

...where I talked to lots of dead people...

01:52

...and what did my dead mom tell me but that my house at Ithaca had been overrun by men

01:57

who were eating my food, spending my money, and trying to marry my wife. Time to get home,

02:03

you say? I couldn't have agreed more. Problem was, I couldn't get home. First there

02:10

were the Sirens...

02:11

...and then Scylla<<sill-uh>> took a bite out of my crew...

02:14

...and then there was a shipwreck, and everyone died but me...

02:17

...and then I washed up on Calypso's island and she compelled me to be her boyfriend.

02:22

Again… please don't tell Penelope. After seven years with Calypso, the gods finally

02:27

orchestrated my escape. Of course, Poseidon, the big jerk, was still mad at me for what

02:31

I did to his one-eyed son, so he wrecked my raft.

02:33

A little help from a sea nymph got me to the island of the Phaeacians<<fay-she-ins>>, where

02:37

I revealed that I was the Trojan Horse guy. The Phaeacians then took me home to Ithaca.

02:44

Thanks to my dead mom, I knew I had dozens of sleazy suitors camped out in my house.

02:49

The goddess Athena disguised me as a beggar so I could get the lay of the land.

02:53

Then, while staying in my swineherd's hut, who should I meet but my son, Telemachus<<tell-uh-ma-kiss>>.

03:00

We shared a manly hug, then decided that the suitors had to go.

03:03

The next day, my wife had the suitors compete for her hand in an archery competition with

03:07

my old bow.

03:09

The man who could string the bow and shoot an arrow through a dozen ax heads would win

03:13

the competition and my wife. Of course, I took home the gold.

03:17

Then, my son and I...

03:18

...with an able assist from the household staff...

03:21

...killed all the suitors, and a few other people besides. It was like a Die Hard movie.

03:27

I revealed myself to my wife, but she didn't believe I was me until I told her that our

03:31

bed was made out of an olive tree with its roots still in the ground.

03:35

That's how my odyssey came to an end. Thanks for making me jump through all those hoops,

03:39

Homer. It was epic.