You were exposed and taken as prisoner your very first day on your very first assignment. That's even worse than showing up late on your first day at a new desk job. You'll be waterboarding your way to an early retirement….

On paper, you make an excellent operative, but you've been having trouble out in the field. After four months in Iran, you haven't been able to recruit a single agent. Even completely untalented actors in L.A. have had better luck than you in that department.

You've been working field ops in a variety of locations for the past several years—you're a good officer and get the job done. You just spend a little too much time playing Zynga Poker on your Droid.

You're an exceptional field officer and have received numerous commendations. You can sniff out treachery better than a trained bloodhound.

You uncovered China's newest secret weapon, and have had heaps of acclaim poured upon you for bringing the plans back to the U.S. so we can keep pace. Who knew it would come in the form of a semi-automatic fortune cookie-launcher?