Portfolio Runoff

It's over. The party, that is. Your investing gig.

You just didn't do all that well, and now the company wants you to move on. They're going to run your portfolio off until it's turned fully into cash and/ or bankruptcies. You had $100 million in assets under management there. Luckily for the firm, $80 million was in stocks and bonds that were reasonably, easily sellable. So they put in limit orders and slowly ran them off, turning the proceeds into cash. Then there was $20 million in a few real estate investment. They put those apartment buildings up for sale. And then there were 25 venture capital investments that would sit likely for years until they were fully run off, i.e. sold or bankrupted and then gone.

All of these images run through your head as you hear the "Almost there!" tone in your new gig as an Uber driver. You hope this one's a big tipper.