Saul Is Blinded By The Light
- Meanwhile, Saul is still hard at work persecuting Christians. Seriously, Saul, give it a rest.
- He's on his way to Damascus to find even more Christians he can throw in jail, when he sees a light suddenly flash from Heaven.
- Saul falls on the ground and hears a voice—"Saul, why do you persecute me?" Um, good question.
- Saul asks the voice to be more specific. Who's calling, please?
- "It's me, Jesus" the voice tells him. Seriously. Did you not see that coming? It's called dramatic irony.
- Anyhow, the voice of Jesus tells Saul to keep heading towards the city and that he'll let him know what to do. Maybe stop persecuting people? Just a thought.
- Saul gets up and—holy crud—he's blind. Luckily, he's traveling with a couple other guys (really confused guys who just heard a crazy voice from Heaven). They help him into Damascus, but it's three days before Saul can see anything again.
Goodbye, Scales; Hello, Discipleship
- There just so happens to be a follower of Jesus named Ananias (not the greedy, dead one from before… a different guy) living in Damascus.
- Ananias has a vision where God tells him to go find Saul and restore his sight.
- Ananias is a tiny bit skeptical, though. Um, God, hasn't Saul been rounding up Christians left and right? Are you sure I should just walk in there and introduce myself and heal him in the name of Jesus?
- Yeah, it's totally cool, God tells him. He's gonna bring my message to the Gentiles and all that good stuff. And he's gonna suffer quite a bit, too. I kind of dig irony.
- So Ananias goes and heals Saul and "something like scales fell from his eyes." Gross.
- After that, Saul is baptized and eats a little and then starts to feel better. Heavenly visions are a like a really nasty flu sometimes.
Saul Just Wants To Fit In
- Once he feels better, Saul rushes out into the synagogues and starts talking up Jesus.
- The people are pretty astonished. Didn't Saul come to town to arrest Christians? Now he's become one? Weird.
- Naturally, after Saul's been preaching for a while and convincing lots of people, the religious authorities hatch a plot to kill him. Don't these guys have anything better to do with their time?
- The disciples find out about it, though, and sneak Saul out of town at night by lowering him down the wall outside the city in a basket.
- Those disciples are always thinking.
- Saul makes his way to Jerusalem to meet up with his fellow disciples, but they're a little bit skeptical. Um, these are the same guys you were just trying to get killed a while ago, Saul.
- Barnabas vouches for him in front of the apostles, which puts them a little more at ease. You know what really puts them at ease though? Sending Saul home to Tarsus to do some preaching there instead.
Peter's Doing Stuff Too, You Know
- Peter's also having his own adventures all over the country. He heals a man who's been paralyzed and converts loads of folks in the process. Score!
- When he hears that a disciple named Tabitha (her Greek name is Dorcas) has died in Joppa, he rushes there and brings her back to life. Whoa. Peter has got Lazarus-level healing powers!