Mortality Quotes in Ordinary People

How we cite our quotes: (Chapter.Paragraph)

Quote #7

"It hurts too much to be around you." (22.51)

We can tell Conrad is still grieving, even if he doesn't say it that way, because he tells Lazenby he can't be around him. Lazenby reminds him of his brother, and his death is still an open wound.

Quote #8

"Karen Susan Aldrich […] dead on arrival at Skokie General Hospital…hose attached to the car's exhaust pipe was drawn through a rear window." (26.19)

Conrad is shocked to learn that Karen killed herself. He wants to believe that the hospital helped him, but if someone else in the hospital killed herself, that means Conrad might not have been "cured" after all, and what little security he derived from the belief in his cure is shattered. Now he is scared.

Quote #9

The police chief was quoted. He couldn't understand why a kid would want to hurt himself like that. […] He had tried to explain that he had not been trying to hurt himself, he had merely been trying to die. (26.40)

Notice that Conrad makes a distinction between "hurt[ing] himself" and "trying to die," not thinking they are the same thing. Why are they different to Conrad?