I'm all in. Do you discuss laryngeal consonants?

You better believe it. I also go off on an important tangent about Beowulf .

Because he's Proto-Indo-European? I thought that was written in Anglo-Saxon?

Look, I'm not a one-hit wonder. I'm not only a foundational Danish linguist, but I also had a few useful things to say to students on medieval lit. That's what I'm talking about—interdisciplinary research FTW. My thoughts on the meter of the original text of Beowulf shocked some, even offended others, but everyone appreciated my work.

Must be nice.

I know it's rough. People just don't understand that the connection between signifier and signified is arbitrary. We could just arbitrarily decide the word "cat" is bad and then get outraged when people use it. That would be the same thing! What does "bad" even mean?

Word. People think words are offensive, but it's the cultural connotations that are offensive. How can a bunch of letters in a certain order be inherently offensive? It's not like a bad smell, which we can often all agree is bad.

But there is something to be said about using language that we all agree is bad. I mean, we all have to agree on the meanings of things—whether words or hand gestures or the colors of traffic lights.

I agree, but I still don't understand what makes a word with four letters bad.

Oh, yeah. That's, uh, Wilhelm Streitberg, from Indogermanische Forschungen. Tell him I'm not home, 'kay?

Not home? He said he thinks you are avoiding him. A lot of people would give their right arm to have an editor even answer their email.

Yep, well, not me, man. That guy's after me for a book I just haven't had the time to write. I think he's all out of giving me extensions.

Well, you should at least email him back, or he'll think you're lazy.

I am lazy.

Okay, then. Go about your business.