Interview with Scylla

Interview with Scylla

The following was found on one of those websites where you ask a question, and random people provide answers. You have to be careful with these, because you never know who's answering, but we found the following interchange to be pretty informative—for the most part.

QUESTION:
Just_wondering: What is the Scylla?

Someguy: A lesser-known member of the Wu Tang Clan.

Just_wondering: Thanks!

Odysseus2001: Don't listen to that idiot. The Scylla is an awful sea monster who ate six of my men.

Someguy: And also a lesser-known member of the Wu Tang Clan.

Odysseus2001: Are you serious right now? I'm Odysseus. I think I should know.

Someguy: Oh, so being Odysseus makes you an expert on hip hop?

Odysseus2001: The Scylla was an evil creature with six heads, a ring of dogs around her waist, and a taste for man flesh. There is no rapper named Scylla!

Someotherguy: There actually is a French rapper named Scylla.

Odysseus2001: French rappers? Yeah right. And people say I'm just a myth.

Someotherguy: Whatevs.

Odysseus2001: I just think I should know better than anyone what the Scylla is. After all, I had to sacrifice six of my men to her so that I wouldn't lose my entire ship to that awful whirlpool, Charybdis, on the other side of the strait.

Sailor_6: Yeah, about that... For the record, it totally sucked being chomped on by that creature.

Odysseus2001: Hey, blame the Fates, my friend.

Sailor_6: I do! Why did I have to be one of the ones who was eaten? It isn't fair.

Odysseus2001: If it makes you feel any better, all my other men ended up dying later on.

Sailor_6: That actually does make me feel better. Still, getting ripped from the deck of the ship and having my body torn apart by that hideous beast was no picnic.

Glaucus: Stop talking about her like that! She was once a beautiful nymph, you know? A nymph I loved!

Sailor_6: She wasn't so beautiful when she swallowed me whole.

Glaucus: It's all my fault. She rejected me, and when I went to Circe for a love potion, she gave me a monster potion instead.

Odysseus2001: Yeah, that sounds like something Circe might do.

Seawitch: You know you love it!

Glaucus: I didn't love it! Scylla and I were meant to be! You destroyed my life by turning her into a vile, disgusting, awful beast.

SCYLLA: I'VE HAD ENOUGH OF THIS!

Odysseus2001: Uh oh.

SCYLLA: I'M A PERSON, TOO, YOU KNOW!

Seawitch: No you're not. You're a disgusting monster, thanks to me.

SCYLLA: And thanks to Glaucus! I'll eat you BOTH one day! I swear I will! I'll sic the pack of dogs growing from my waist on you, and you'll be sorry!

Seawitch: You see, Glaucus. Clearly you should've chosen me over this psychopath.

Glaucus: You did this to her!

Seawitch: No, you did actually when you poured that potion into the pool where she bathed.

Glaucus: But I did it for love!

Seawitch: Don't you just love irony?

SCYLLA: I WILL EAT IRONY!

Odysseus2001: Okay, I just checked, and Scylla is actually a Belgian hip hop artist who raps in French.

Someotherguy: Well, you can see how I'd make the mistake.

SCYLLA: I hate these websites.