Just like students look as if they saw a ghost if you ever run into each other outside of the classroom, sometimes it's hard for teachers to remember that our young 'uns have got lives of their own. Whether it's the apathetic burnout, the class clown, or the one who asks you to look at five drafts before letting you grade anything, these kids have got stuff going on at home—and you'd better believe it affects how they act in the classroom.

Sometimes that just means that certain aspects of family dogma are responsible for how that kid does (or doesn't) do their work. But what happens at home doesn't always stay at home. And when it goes beyond study habits, some kids carry that weight around on their shoulders and straight into your classroom.

 

Spoiler alert: your students don't live here.

You will never know all the permutations of families that you'll encounter, and to be honest, it's usually best not to try. But it's important to keep in mind that kids are often shaped long before you get them. So how do you begin to understand their home lives—at least, enough to be more understanding of their issues in the classroom?

Here are a few things they might be facing at home that it'll help you out to consider:

Poverty

Think a kid's gonna do well in school if they don't even have dinner on the table? Not so much. What's important as a teacher is to realize that even if you can't help ease their pecuniary woes, you can create a comfortable environment and be understanding of where they're coming from. The impact of poverty on education is not to be scoffed at, and having a sense of what they're dealing with can help you help them.

Family Dynamics

It's true: sometimes parents and their kids don't get along (gasp!). Sometimes parents are baffled by their children and sometimes kids just want their parent to quit talking to them. The intricacies of family dynamics are beyond count, but often you can sense that something's up. Maybe you can't fine the parents for being bad role models—at least, not yet—but you can contribute to a more positive environment in the classroom.

Mental Illness

If mental illness is a factor in their home life, it's possible that your student has learned some very maladaptive behaviors. Whether it's a parent or sibling with a diagnosis or whether your student has a learning disorder or depressive tendencies, mental illness can cause enough flux in a kid's life that the collateral damage spills into your classroom.

Disability

Out of the brain and into the body (as if they're all that separate)—some students are dealing either with their own disability or someone else's. Some students are primary caregivers to a parent who is disabled, but even when the parent is minimally disabled, these students can sometime appear to be adrift in a sea of troubles.

Abuse

It's hard to stomach, but sometimes we run across a student who may be the victim of abuse at home. If you suspect emotional, physical or sexual abuse, you're a mandatory reporter, so report it—even if it's just a suspicion. Abuse could be causing negative behaviors in a few of your students—some of the most challenging behaviors you'll ever see in your career.

Divorce

Families break up. Parents stop loving each other. The china flies against the wall. And kids often shoulder feelings of guilt, believing they are the cause of their parents' divorce even when they aren't. Whether it's the guilt thing or just plain old upset at the turmoil at home, this can turn even the most cheerful of students into cranky, disoriented, and upset little monsters.

Their Own Relationships

Yeah, chances are this isn't "home," exactly, but whether it's second-graders holding hands or seniors in high school with hickeys on their skinny little necks, you better believe that students are going to have some relationships of their own that can impact the way they behave in the classroom. Whether it's romance, family, friends, or imaginary friends, kids will always have something going down in their out-of-the-classroom lives that affects their in-the-classroom lives.

This is tough stuff. Is it your job to fix it? Let's go with no, no, and a big resounding nope. Sometimes they'll want to confide in you and other times you'll never know the details, but reminding yourself that certain behaviors may not be your fault, but the effect of issues at home, can help your own approach to their education and mindset.

Which makes it doubly important to try to understand what they are going through. Yes, even if they don't tell you. It may require talking with them privately and getting them help, or it may just be observing that they're a little down today and giving them the space they need.

What matters is that kids never feel judged, but supported—even if it's just a smile, a pat on the back, or leaving them the heck alone.