University of California--Santa Barbara

About Me

Intro

Don't believe everything you've heard. Wait…what have you heard? Okay, yes, I'm kind of a party school. In fact, there are usually parties in at least half the houses in Isla Vista on any given Friday, but that doesn't mean I get no studying done.

For example, during the very first week of school, entire dorm floors have been known to take nighttime pilgrimages to the beach and dive into the big, blue Pacific to observe the bioluminescence—now that's hands-on learning.

Seriously, though, I have a first class marine biology program with some of the most modern facilities in the country. My students study some of the most pressing problems of our time, like climate change, the loss of biodiversity, and pollution. (Who knew that cow farts could be so dangerous?)

Additionally, I'm known internationally for my mathematics program, which is particularly proficient in low dimensional topology. How fancy does that sound? Other noteworthy programs are economics, engineering, and sociology.

Maybe you want to come here to find yourself and to hit a few great parties in the process. Maybe you're laser-focused and ready to change the world already. (Seriously, what's taking so long?) Either way, you can enjoy some of the most beautiful scenery in the world while you do it.

Name

Gauchos

Hometown

My name says it all—er, actually, not quite. Go to Santa Barbara, California…and then head north. Yeah, I'm not actually in the city of Santa Barbara. I'm in the peaceful little town of Goleta, which is filled with residential homes, mom-n-pop shops, and one giant university (that's me). In fact, Goleta begins and ends with me—step one foot off of the north side of campus, and you're in Isla Vista. That's the town that gives me my party school reputation, but you don't haveto live there. I guess…

Birthdate

1891 as Anna Blake School, but I became UC Santa Barbara in 1944.

Body Type

I'm the biggest of the not-so-big. I have about 22,000 students, which are mainly undergrads. As a result, you may find GE classes just a little bit crowded.

On a brighter note, you can always find a good spot in the 8:00AM sections. Hehe. Wonderful…

Upper division classes tend to be much smaller, but be careful. Your professor will notice if you're not there or if you're dozing off after a hard night of partying—or, you know, studying.

One word: caffeine.

Current Living Situation

As I mentioned earlier, I'm situated between two very different towns: Goleta and Isla Vista. If you live in a house in Goleta, you will have a quaint residential experience filled with peace, tranquility, and full nights of sleep.

If you live in Isla Vista, you won't.

Either way, you'll probably share a nice, big house with five or six of your buddies, and in Isla Vista, you may have a view of the ocean—not bad.

If you live on campus, you may also have a view of the ocean. My dorms were built on some of the most beautiful land in the state, with my own personal beach in easy walking distance. It's just that, well, your room won't be all that big, so you might have to leave your life-sized Darth Vader action figure at home.

Sorry—you'll have to impress your friends some other way.

You will, however, have the option of turning your bed and your roomie's bed into a bunk, thereby creating a whole rug's worth of walkable floor. Maybe Darth has a future in your room, after all.

Relationship Status

My closest rival is UC Berkeley. We compete intensely in the areas of liberalism and mathematics. It's a strange mix, but trust me…I can throw down with both.

In sports, my fiercest rival is the Idaho Vandal—yes, Vandal. If I win, I may get into the NCAA basketball tournament, where I will likely be defeated in the first round. You never know though…this could be my year.

Religion

Well, I'm not exactly known for my piety. Students are mostly into partying and marine biology…or partying in the ocean, which is the best of both worlds. However, there is a small but significant Christian community on campus, so don't let my reputation scare you off if Jesus is your homeboy. Gaucho Christian Fellowship will be there for you.

Politics

Get a paint bucket handy, because you're going to want to go as far as you can to the left, then extend that line about five feet further. Now, the Economics and Business Departments are a bit more center of the road, but the Humanities and Social Science Department is as liberal as you will find anywhere.

You should apply to me if...

your philosophy is that if you have to study, you might as well do it by the beach.