Sex Ed

Sample Lesson - Introduction

Lesson 3.02: Let's Talk About Sex, Baby

As Nelly famously sang: "It's getting hot in here, so take off all your popsicle sticks…I am gettin' so hot, I'm gonna take my popsicle sticks off."
(Source)

Clears throat:

Well, Shmooper, there comes a time in an educational website and a student's relationship where they need to have "the talk." You know…the birds and the bees; the flowers and the pollen; the storks and the…storks the storks have crushes on.

It's true—we haven't yet discussed the big S, and it's high time we did. We'd be remiss if we sent you off into the world knowing all the details circling the orbit of this topic and with no information whatsoever about the actual "dirty deed" itself.

We talked a bit before about instinct and the drive to procreate, so that's the very basic function of sex: we do it so we don't die out as a human race. But since we're not cavemen anymore, we do it for a great many more reasons, and some get as complicated as money and media. (Go figure.)

With the basic body function and hormonal drive to have sex and the push by society and media, we think it's pretty darn important that you understand what it is and why we do it. And that's what this lesson is all about. We'll give you the basics to clear up any confusion you might have about sex, and we'll keep things as factual and un-embarrassing as possible. It's a pretty "hot topic," if you know what we mean, and Shmoop is just the one to fan the flames of knowledge.

And rest assured: no storks, birds, or bees were harmed in the writing of this lesson.

Sample Lesson - Reading

Reading 3.3.02a: The Boom-Boom

There are about a million ways we talk about sex, from ridiculous terms your grandparents may use (like "relations" or "hanky panky") to dubious terms young folks these days may use ("the boom-boom," "the humpty-hump," "Shmoopin' on the down low"…need we go on?) to weird new slang that you have no idea about (hizzit the skizzins?)—it's no wonder you feel like you must be missing out on the party of the year if you're not up to speed on all this sexual terminology.

But don't sweat it. We'll teach you about the basics, and you can always pick up on the nuances at a later time. Ahem, this just in: even Shmoop has been caught unawares about the lingo from time to time. Please don't let on, it will totally kill our image.

What Is It?

Though it may seem that there's always something new under the sun, the bottom line is that in reality, sex is a really a very simple process.

Defined technically as sexual intercourse, "sex" is, biologically, about a man inserting his penis into a woman's vagina and ejaculating sperm.

End of story. Done.

Be that as it may, it's a whole 'nother world when you get into the details. Things like attraction, love, and sexual orientation come into play, and the whole "biological sex" thing starts to get a bit more complicated.

The big qualifier? Not all sex is heterosexual, baby-making vaginal intercourse. (See? That's so important to keep in mind we bolded it.) There's also oral sex (mouth-to-genital), anal sex (genital-in-anus), and many other types of sex that "your generation" has that Shmoop's way too square to know about. Please read more about them—and other important aspects of sex—in this article from Planned Parenthood. It'll talk about all the different details regarding sex and how we define it. Be sure to read all five parts to the article, from "What's sex?" to "Should I talk with my parents about sex?"

Fairy Tale First Times

What will the first time be like? Unfortunately, it's not a Romeo and Juliet experience for everyone. In fact, you might expect that things won't exactly be sexperfect the first time you attempt it. Thanks to media images and the stories we read and hear, we have a lot of preconceived notions about what sex for the first time will be like. Take a look at this article, written for teens, by teens, about what you might actually expect the first time you have sex.

That's It?

If you decide to have sex—and that's a big if, mind you—there might be a lot that won't meet your expectations. This is pretty normal. Sex isn't something people "master" or "become awesome at." It has more to do with the partner you choose, how mentally ready you are, and how connected you both feel. But it's not a reason to stop or to swear off sex altogether.

Take a look at this article, which explains the various disappointments people may have with sex and the reasons for them. You may simply not be ready, or in the right frame of mind, and with a few changes or some time, you may try again to experience a better outcome.

Sample Lesson - Reading

Reading 3.3.02b: The Virginity Complex

Since the average age people start having sex is 17, it figures that pop culture and media take "sex for the first time" as a concept and run with it. Think about movies like The 40 Year-Old-Virgin, the American Pie franchise, Easy A, and others that focus heavily on teens being initiated into adulthood through sex.

The fact that virginity—especially female virginity—is commonly obsessed about is nothing new. Female virginity has been prized (emphasis on the literal application of that term) for centuries. In the olden days, much of this prize status stemmed from the fact that men wanted to pass on their inheritance to children they knew were their own; a woman who hadn't had sex with anyone else could be "trusted" to be the mother of a man's children. Yeah, there were no DNA tests back then. For example, for Christians, the Virgin Mary is a big deal because she never had sex, but got pregnant with Jesus. Hence, the whole virgin birth thingy being a miracle.

So for teens such as yourself, virginity can be marketed, talked about, and bragged about until you're kind of sick of hearing about it. Some people believe it's a power or a "gift" that you give to the person you're going to marry, and others believe losing it is simply a stepping stone to adulthood. After all is said and done, you're going to have to make your own choices regarding virginity and how you'll approach sex for the first time.

Please read this article about virginity, which will hopefully answer more of your questions. Read all six parts of the article, from "What does it mean to be a virgin?" to "Can you get pregnant when you lose your virginity?" And because it's such an important topic, we want you to read "Defining Virginity" as well. Make sure you read all of the information on the page, and click on over to the activity once you're done.

Sample Lesson - Activity

Activity 3.02a: Q&A

Yep, that was a lot of information thrown at you all at once. We won't hold it against you if you want to venture back into the reading and do another go-around. In fact, we encourage you to do just that. This activity is going to focus on what you learned about sex, the details surrounding it, and what virginity means, so make sure you have a good grasp on the basics. Please answer the following questions with at least two complete sentences each, citing evidence from your readings to back up your responses.

Sample Lesson - Activity

Activity 3.02b: Sex Myths

Now that you have all the facts from your readings, you can think about the myths. What have you seen in the movies or on TV, or heard from friends (or even family members), about sex that you know now just isn't true?

We're dying to add your info to our sex myths collection.

To get you thinking, here's a funny SexEtc.org video that some teen advocates for sexual health have put together about sex myths. Watch the video, and see how many of the myths you've heard of or recognize.

Sample Lesson - Activity

Activity 3.02c: Sexpectations Pamphlet

Now that we're all aware of what happens when our body meets another body, we can focus on how important educating everyone about this process is. Think about what you know now that you didn't know before. Hopefully you're a more well-informed individual who has some knowledge about the important decisions coming up in your life.

All this knowledge is supremely excellent, but we don't just want it to affect our Shmoopers. We want it to affect everyone else, too. That's why we want you to create a "Sexpectations Pamphlet" (heh heh) in which you educate others about the decisions, information, and myths regarding sex.

Your pamphlet should have the following:

Page 1: An illustrated cover.
Page 2: A table of contents that lists the page numbers and titles of the sections in your pamphlet.
Page 3: Information about sex and virginity—at least three paragraphs defining main terms, and recapping what to expect the first time. 
Page 4: At least two paragraphs with the responsibilities of sex and how to reduce risks.
Page 5: A "Student-to-Student Tips" section featuring five tips and made-up scenarios, in which you give real-life factoids about dating, how to know if you're ready for sex, and how to make good decisions about your body.
Page 6: A back cover with a five-sentence summary of what is in the pamphlet.
Additional: Throughout the pamphlet, include at least three illustrations, diagrams, drawings, pictures, or graphics that are scientific or representative of facts in the pamphlet.

You can create your pamphlet digitally on the computer, or you can hand-create one with paper, pen, and art supplies. The choice is yours, Shmooper—that's why you have a two-day lesson.

Here's a brief example of what a Shmoop pamphlet might look like:

Page 1: A cover with a colorful picture of a heart (awww) and the title "Sex and Relationships."
Page 2: A table of contents that lists page 3, "Sex and Virginity Information," page 4, "Risks and Responsibilities Information," and page 5, "Student Tips."
Page 3: A section of information about sex under the heading "Information about Sex" with the subheadings "Sex for the First Time" and "Myths about Sex and Virginity" and at least ten complete sentences.
Page 4: A section of information about risks under the heading "Staying Safe" with the subheadings "Responsibilities" and "Relationships" and at least ten complete sentences.
Page 5: Some student tips with five made-up scenarios of students giving advice to other students. For example: Bella, seventeen, says that talking to your parents, your partner, and other trusted adults is the best way to find out if you're ready for sex. It should be a personal decision, but one that is based on a collection of knowledge and facts.
Page 6: A back cover with a five-sentence summary of what is in the pamphlet. For example: In this pamphlet, sponsored by Shmoop, you'll find information about sex that's down-to-earth and useful for teens. You'll also be exposed to insider's tips from real-life students like you, who need all the facts and none of the myths about important decisions.

When you're ready, upload your pamphlet here: