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Things Fall Apart Summary 159502 Views


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Description:

All Okonkwo was asking for was a little R-E-S-P-E-C-T. Granted, swinging your machete around may not be the nicest way to ask, but still. The guy deserved better.

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Transcript

00:05

Things Fall Apart, a la Shmoop. You think you've got daddy issues? Try growing

00:11

up with my Pops, Okonkwo < Oh-kawn-kwoh>.

00:19

I was never good enough for “Mr. Big Successful Yam Farmer,” no-siree. He was always after

00:22

me to be tougher, manlier, and better with power tools. I think he wanted me to be a

00:25

mini-version of him, which is certainly rich, because Okonkwo sure didn’t win any “Father

00:32

of the Year” awards.

00:34

Need an example? Check this out....Okonkwo sort of inherited this hostage kid from another

00:41

tribe…

00:41

…which was okay, because Ikemefuna <Ee-keh-meh-foo-nah> turned out to be a pretty cool dude. Dad liked

00:46

him, too. In fact, he liked Ike a lot more than he liked me. …

00:50

…But that still didn't stop him from going all Texas Chainsaw Massacre when the tribe

00:55

decided to kill Ike. You see, Dad didn't want the guys to think he was weak, so he let his

01:01

machete do the talking. Nobody really wanted to get on Okonkwo’s bad side after that…

01:09

Dad was really big on respect. Is one of your wives talking back to you? Use her for target

01:11

practice.

01:11

Did a lowly peon dare to disagree with you during a meeting? Call him a lady. Yep, Okonkwo

01:11

was quite the charmer. "Nwoye,” (Nuh-woh-yeh) he used to say, "I yam what I yam." Well,

01:11

actually I couldn't hear what he said over the sounds of his fist hitting me repeatedly,

01:11

but I'm sure he meant something along those lines.

01:11

In fact, the only person he gave a fig about, besides the adopted son he sliced in half,

01:16

was his daughter Ezinma < Eh-zeen-mah>.

01:18

I know, her name sounds like a skin condition, but she's my half-sister, so watch it. When

01:24

she got sick, Okonkwo was all, "I'll save you!" and made her a special medicine. The

01:30

guy never so much as gave me a Band-Aid. But karma finally caught up with Okonkwo when

01:38

he shot a kid during a tribal “21 gun salute.” Unfortunately, there aren’t a whole lot

01:44

of gun safety classes in Nigeria.

01:48

Since he didn't mean to whack the kid, he only got 7 years of exile from the village.

01:54

Naturally, I started planning the mother of all house parties, but it turns out I had

02:00

to go with him into the boonies.

02:05

News from the home front wasn't great...apparently the whites took out a bunch of neighboring

02:13

villagers that killed a tourist. Or maybe it was a missionary. The villagers didn't

02:16

really investigate. Anyway, those pesky evangelists started trickling

02:19

into our neighborhood…

02:21

… and their peace and love spiel sounded a lot better than my dad’s "slice and dice"

02:23

policy. Plus, those missionaries had some really good mojo, because they voluntarily

02:23

decided to live in the Evil Forest…

02:23

…and they didn't die horrible deaths! I was kind of impressed, but I knew dad would

02:23

kill me if I hung out with the Christians. Then he actually did try to kill me, so I

02:25

decided to cut my losses and join the missionary school. That oughtta fix his little red wagon!

02:26

When Pops got back after his 7 year timeout, he was super-angry to find the white man taking

02:31

over his stomping grounds and changing things up in a big way. There was a serious culture

02:36

clash...they insulted our gods…

02:38

…so we burned their church. That little shenanigan landed Okonkwo in prison for a

02:42

while.

02:42

The minute he got out of the slammer, Dad was on fire for revenge, and he got pretty

02:48

P.O.ed that no one wanted to back him up. So, he killed himself.

02:55

The tribe was really upset about it, but they still knuckled under to the missionaries,

02:59

and all Okonkwo’s efforts got him was a paragraph in a white guy's book.

03:04

Sure, my dad was a jerk, but in the end, he deserved more respect than he died with. So

03:08

long, Pops. This yam’s for you.

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