Goodbye, Columbus Manipulation Quotes

By expressing his disapproval of her so early in the relationship, Neil puts Brenda in the position of trying to please him. She can't take her nose job back, so a sense of futility probably contributes to their break-up. You know what they say: Nose Goes.

Neil is afraid that Julie and Brenda have learned that they deserve to have what they want at all costs, even if it hurts others. But then again, it's just basketball… maybe he's getting a little ahead of himself.

Neil feels manipulated by Brenda. He wants to be with her, not her sister. He has a real inferiority complex about Brenda's family being richer than his. Neil probably thinks she wouldn't have subjected a rich boyfriend to the same treatment, but Neil thinks a lot of things that aren't necessarily true.

Aunt Gladys is warm-hearted and kind. She definitely means well, but does this attitude contribute to Neil's inferiority complex and subsequent sabotage of his relationship with Brenda? Is it a form of manipulation? Why or why not?

Neil can't get over thinking that Brenda looks down on him and doesn't treat him the way she would a wealthier man. He uses this accusation to manipulate her into proving her love by buying the diaphragm even though it makes her uncomfortable.

Neil seems to want the diaphragm both so they can have sex without fear of pregnancy and because he wants Brenda to do something for him that makes her uncomfortable. Instead of trying to discuss the issue with her, he presents the it's-right-because-I-say-so argument. Very mature.

Instead of trying to help make easier what he knows is really difficult for Brenda, Neil stresses his own pleasure. All this is partially brought on by Brenda's insensitivity to him—the Newark comment, the babysitting—but instead of telling her honestly, he punishes her by being insensitive back. Plus, like Brenda, part of him is just plain selfish.

"Defender of the Faith," a short story in Goodbye, Columbus and Five Other Stories, features a character who uses his Judaism to manipulate others into giving him special treatment. This is why some Jewish people accuse Roth of perpetuating negative stereotypes about Jews. One way to look at this is to ask the question, is it only Jewish people who do this? Is there something you yourself "use" to get what you want? Each reader will feel differently about this hot-button issue, hopefully after giving it serious thought.

Neil's accusing Brenda of leaving the diaphragm at home so her Mother would find it and "force" her to stop seeing Neil, giving her an excuse to break up with him. We don't know about you, but that seems like an awfully complicated and not sure-fire way to do the whole break-up thing. It's not clear whether he thinks she acted deliberately or subconsciously, but it is clear that he doesn't consider the fact that Brenda didn't want the diaphragm in the first place.

This might lend some credence to Neil's theory that Brenda orchestrated the drama with her parents. She seems to genuinely love Neil and even want to marry him, but all of his criticisms and manipulations gave her some serious doubts. If she hadn't been doubting Neil, she might have risked her parent's disapproval to stay with him—which is what his line is getting at.