How we cite our quotes: (Chapter.Paragraph)
Quote #4
I was born to live in exile, it appeared, and my one way home was by way of dying. So I went on westward and turned back no more. (6.4)
Estraven shares a sense of the Other with Ai. Like the Envoy, Estraven's otherness comes from his worldview and his desire to perform his duty. They're a match made in outcast heaven.
Quote #5
I did not ask him his [name]. I must learn to live without shadows as they do in Orgoreyn; not to take offense; not to offend uselessly. (6.30)
In Orgoreyn, Estraven must change his shifgrethor or else he'll be labeled an Other (or at least more of an Other than he already is). And that won't help Ai any.
Quote #6
A man wants his virility regarded, a woman wants her femininity appreciated, however indirect and subtle the indications of regard and appreciation. On Winter they will not exist. One is respected and judged only as a human being. It is an appalling experience. (7.18)
Okay, setting aside the maybe outdated ideas about what men and women want, the Investigator points out the problem with being an Other in Gethen society. No one treats you as you would expect to be treated. This can be especially frustrating when you're at the bar looking for a date.