How we cite our quotes: (Chapter.Paragraph)
Quote #1
He shifted in his seat and smiled secretly. The pleasure of self-discovery. (1.7)
We're only seven paragraphs in, and already we're getting a hint that Jacob is about to discover himself, plus he's already musing on how to find himself. When he first sees Ton, Jacob gets one answer to the question of his identity, but it's not the only answer.
Quote #2
Remembering home he suddenly became inward and didn't want to say any more about all that. He dabbed flakes of croissant on to a finger-end and licked them away. (4.41)
It's as if Jacob doesn't want to come clean about who he is and why he's in Amsterdam—he doesn't want his grandpa's legacy to dictate who he is. And you know what? We get that. The only problem is that Jacob doesn't seem to be sure who he's gonna be without it.
Quote #3
Never had I uttered such a speech before. Never had I thought myself capable of it. Never have I made such a speech again. Because, perhaps, never did such anger seize me as possessed me that day. Upstairs in the ruins of my home foreign soldiers were fighting for my country. Here in the cellar I was fighting for myself. (7.40)
Geertrui stands up for Jacob to her family. We love a headstrong heroine in any book, but we can't help but notice that this speech is more about her finding herself and her real feelings for Jacob than it is about anything else. And we can get behind that too.
Quote #4
The familiar hated affliction— feeling awkward, foolish, inept, embarrassed— surged through him, but for once he did not care and paid it no attention. The mouse dream flitted through his mind. Then he thought of Anne Frank and of his visit to her house— no, not her house, her museum— that morning. And now this and these tears. All somehow connected. (9.87)
When Jacob finds out about Geertrui's scheduled death, he cries, but not because she's going—nope, he's more emotional about the fact that he's alive. It's telling since Jacob seems so detached and disconnected at the beginning of the book.
Quote #5
How difficult it is sometimes to explain yourself to yourself. Sometimes there only is, and no knowing. (12.2)
Jacob thinks this on the way to meet Geertrui in the nursing home. He seems to have a harder time than most connecting with himself. Do you think this changes by the end of the book?
Quote #6
"Maybe we should always start everything from the inside and work to the outside, and not from the outside to the inside. Maybe life would be better that way. What d'you think?" (15.25)
Hille says this to Jacob and we don't think she's talking literally—it's really more about looking inside someone and figuring out who they are than, say, exploring their organs. This is what she wants to do with Jacob, but he's still figuring it out for himself.
Quote #7
All afternoon he had felt liberated, free to be himself in a new way. A self that had been suppressed, hidden, not allowed out, had been released. He liked this new self, and told himself that he was not going to let it be shut away again. (16.111)
Check out that word liberated. After visiting his grandpa's grave and getting to know Hille, Jacob finally feels free—he gets to be himself for once, almost like someone being liberated in a war.
Quote #8
And suddenly he thought for the first time, surprising himself: I don't want to go back. I want to stay here. There's more for me here than there. And I can be more me here than I can be there. (21.27)
Finally Jacob seems content in Amsterdam. He thinks this after learning the truth about his grandpa, which makes us wonder whether that was his missing piece all along. If he hadn't have learned about Jacob's affair with Geertrui, would he still want to go back to Amsterdam? We'll let you answer that one.
Quote #9
"Ton never sleeps with women. That's the way he is. Simone only sleeps with me. That's the way she is. I sleep with them both. That's the way I am. They both want to sleep with me. That's how we are. That's how we want it. If we didn't, or if any one of us didn't, then, okay, that's it. All the stuff about gender. Male, female, queer, bi, feminist, new man, whatever—it's meaningless. As out of date as marriage forever. I'm tired of hearing about it. We're beyond that now." (21.56)
As part of Jacob's quest to find himself, he's also got to figure out his sexual identity. He's confused as to why he's in attracted to a guy, and why he tried to convince himself he was a she. Daan and Ton help Jacob figure out that he doesn't just have to be one thing.
Quote #10
"After all, we're your Dutch family. You're one of us. You belong to us." (22.40)
Tessel claims Jacob in the name of Holland. Okay, we're only half serious. She does think it's a good idea for Jacob to visit them again though, since they have a shared history and all—and we think Jacob agrees. He seems to feel a connection to Tessel, Daan, and Geertrui that he doesn't with others.