Mark Watney Quotes

Once again, we watch Mark achieve some high-minded scientific goals though some very primitive techniques. If we get nothing else from The Martian, it's that science isn't about laboratories or equations—it's about getting your hands dirty and making things work.

Actually, that doesn't sound silly at all. Throughout The Martian, Mark is forced to use some seriously lo-fi solutions for some big time problems—problems usually caused by complex modern technology. That newfangled stuff can be nice, but sometimes you just have to go back to basics.

That's a tall order. Learning how to farm was an important step in the development of civilization, and now Mark is trying to make the leap all by himself. If he can do it, he'll be one step closer to taming this barren Martian wasteland.

At this point, Mark just wants to survive. Maybe the work he's doing now will set the stage for future human colonization of Mars, creating the guidebook that later explorers will follow. That would actually be pretty awesome. Still, Mark has no desire to stay on Mars any longer than he has to.

Mark never gets used to life on Mars. The Hab helps him stay sane, providing him a small connection with his life back on Earth, but even that is fleeting. Sooner or later, Mark is going to need to explore more of the Martian surface—that is, if he's up to the challenge.

Well, that didn't take long—it's only a matter of time until he starts making decrees. Still, he better not get too cocky. He might be winning the battle, but the war is still a'raging.

This must be simultaneously thrilling and terrifying. On one hand, it probably feels pretty cool, like he's breaking a Guinness World Record every day. On the other, Mark literally has no idea what could be waiting for him on the other side of that hill. Spoiler: it's probably Martians.

He actually did it! Mark is feeling pretty good about life right now: creating the first Martian farm feels like slam dunking the ball in Mars' face. Now that's what you call a Space Jam.

And just like that, Mark is down a dozen points in the fourth quarter. Every time it looks like he's about to pull away with the victory, Mars pulls out a crazy trick play and takes the lead.

You're getting a little ahead of yourself on this one, Mark. Although you've done an admirable job surviving thus far, you've got to admit that you're fighting a losing battle—Mars is the god of war, after all. Your only hope is to run away before it's too late.

Mark must feel really weird to be leaving Mars. Although he hasn't had a great time during his stay, Mark has become used to his lifestyle there, no matter how bizarre it might be. That being said, we're still willing to bet he won't be back anytime soon.

Getting stuck on Mars is a bummer; missing out on Granny Watney's famous pumpkin pie is a tragedy. Jokes aside, we're sure that the Watney family is having a pretty bad Thanksgiving too. It just won't feel the same without Mark.

The Hab is Mark's home away from home. It provides him shelter, food, and—most importantly–-a little bit of relaxation. It's not much, but it'll have to do.

Don't worry, Mark—we're not throwing you any shade on this one. It's been nice chatting with NASA, but those eggheads are nothing compared to dear old Mama Watney. No matter how insignificant it might seem to us on the outside, getting that message must feel like finding the Holy Grail

You know you're going crazy when you're feeling sentimental about brutal Chicago winters: those things are icier than Gucci Mane. Nostalgia sure has a funny way of working sometimes.

The Hab's been through a lot. It's been blown up. It's been deflated. It's been covered—literally—with Mark's poop. It must stink. Despite all of this, Mark still feels an immense amount of comfort when he's there. It might be nasty, but it's a familiar kind of nasty.

For the first time, Mark actually believes that he'll make it home. That's huge. It was a struggle to survive, but he never took his eyes off the prize—planet Earth. This guy's been seeing red for way too long.

Mark, you sly devil! He has a point, though. Even if he makes it home, Mark's life will never be the same. He'll never be able to be anonymous again. Whether that's good or not depends entirely on your perspective.

Of course, it's not all sunshine and daisies—there's no way that six people can live together without any conflict. The important part is that they all eventually get back together, no matter what petty squabbles they might have had. In a way, it's a lot like living in a college dorm—except, you know, the whole space part.

Mark and Martinez must be bros for life. This isn't the kind of thing you'd ask of a random classmate or coworker—this is something you'd only ask of your best friend.