Old people...blech. Good thing you’ll never have to be one of those, now that you’ve mastered the art of immortality. For those of us who aren’t dabbling in the dark arts, let’s figure out how to be nice to our elders...after all, that’ll be us, someday. Unless our cool dark arts dabbling friend shares the secret...eh? Eh? …Worth a try.
[ old man voice ] "Speak up, Sonny,"
or offering you prunes while they
tell you the same boring story [old man talking to a girl]
about their knitting club for the billionth time.
They're just a waste of space taking up time and valuable resources.
Anyone over the age of 60 is pretty much dead, anyway.
Just ask these people. [someone flipping pages of a book]
Okay, well, maybe they've got a little spark of life
left in them, but anyone over 70 is definitely...
Huh. But, hey, she probably doesn't do that much in an average day, right? [Actress Betty White announcing an award]
Probably naps, watches soap operas...
Wow, and we thought finally doing two weeks' worth of laundry was an accomplishment.
Look, we don't think we're gonna turn into senile boxes
of rocks the second we hit 60, right?
So why would we think anyone else would? [a carton box filled with rocks]
Believe it or not, old folks are capable of doing some pretty amazing things.
Like Fauja Singh, who was still running marathons
when he was 101 years old.
Or Ronald Reagan, who was elected President [Fauja Singh running in front of Taj Mahal]
at age 69.
Or Jessica Tandy, who won her first Academy Award
at the tender age of 80.
Bottom line - age is nothing but a number.
And even when we're old and gray, [an old man talking to a girl]
we'll still be capable of, well,
just about whatever we set our mind to.
Plus, we'll have enough wisdom and years under our belt
to realize how lucky we are for every day we're alive.
Basically, we'll be just like we are now [old man watching a TV show]
only smarter, more grateful,
and with a hankering for prunes.
Heh. Us version 2.0.
And if any youngins pass judgment on us,
well, we'll probably be black belts by then, so, [sign board on a door - NO OLD PEOPLE]
well, watch out.
If this video doesn't teach them to respect us,
we're sure a well-placed karate chop will.