Bell Curve

Bell Curve

1
5%

Judicial Clerk. Salary: $54,350 
It's your first day on the job as a judicial law clerk. In all the excitement, you accidentally file a plea as not-guilty as opposed to the guilty verdict you intended. You accidentally set a guilty man free. Oh well, it was fun while it lasted.

2
25%

Assistant U.S. Attorney. Salary: $56,000
After applying seventeen times, you finally get the U.S. attorney's office to take a chance and hire you. You assure everyone that they won't be sorry. First day on the job, you agree to give the client a sandwich that his mother packed for him. It contained a Swiss army knife that you just barely caught before handing it over.

3
50%

Assistant U.S. Attorney. Salary: $60,000
You've been an AUSA for four years and are in stride with the job. Only problem is, it's super tough paying back your student loans from law school and you can't declare bankruptcy or you'll lose your job. You've got a lot of work ahead of you.

4
75%

U.S. Attorney. Salary: $80,000
You finally get appointed to the U.S. Attorney of Guam and the Mariana Islands. You will need to move your entire family to Guam, but what the heck, it's beautiful out there. Sadly there are a lot of bugs and you're allergic. You break out in hives your first day in court, but still, you've finally made it.

5
95%

Hot-Shot U.S. Attorney. Salary: $100,000
You are the most successful, hottest, busiest U.S. Attorney California has ever seen. You have a perfect record of conviction and are much beloved in the state. The President has personally invited you over to the White House for dinner. It seems like he wants to talk about furthering your political career. They want to make a movie out of your life story and Meryl Streep wants the role. Couldn't they get someone younger?