The Bad Beginning Cunning and Cleverness Quotes

Violet had a real knack for inventing and building strange devices, so her brain was often filled with images of pulleys, levers, and gears, and she never wanted to be distracted by something as trivial as her hair. (1.3)

Klaus Baudelaire, the middle child, and the only boy, liked to examine creatures in tide-pools. Klaus was a little older than twelve and wore glasses, which made him look intelligent. He was intelligent. The Baudelaire parents had an enormous library in their mansion, a room filled with thousands of books on nearly every subject. Being only twelve, Klaus of course had not read all of the books in the Baudelaire library, but he had read a great many of them and had retained a lot of the information from his readings. (1.4)

"You seem like very intelligent people," Justice Strauss said. "I daresay you would have thought of something." (4.3)

"What's important is that I have found out your plan."

"Is that so?" Count Olaf said, his one eyebrow raising. "And what is my plan, you little runt?"

Klaus ignored the insult and opened the book to where one of the scraps of paper was marking his place. "' The laws of marriage in this community are very simple,'" he read out loud. "' The requirements are as follows: the presence of a judge, a statement of "I do" by both the bride and the groom, and the signing of an explanatory document in the bride's own hand.'" Klaus put down the book and pointed at Count Olaf. "If my sister says 'I do' and signs a piece of paper, while Justice Strauss is in the room, then she is legally married. This play you're putting on shouldn't be called The Marvelous Marriage. It should be called The Menacing Marriage. You're not going to marry Violet figuratively—you're going to marry her literally! This play won't be pretend; it will be real and legally binding."

Count Olaf laughed a rough, hoarse laugh. "Your sister isn't old enough to get married."

"She can get married if she has the permission of her legal guardian, acting in loco parentis," Klaus said. "I read that, too. You can't fool me."

"Why in the world would I want to actually marry your sister?" Count Olaf asked. "It is true she is very pretty, but a man like myself can acquire any number of beautiful women."

Klaus turned to a different section of Nuptial Law. "A legal husband," he read out loud, "has the right to control any money in the possession of his legal wife." Klaus gazed at Count Olaf in triumph. "You're going to marry my sister to gain control of the Baudelaire fortune! Or at least, that's what you planned to do. But when I show this information to Mr. Poe, your play will not be performed, and you will go to jail!"

Count Olaf's eyes grew very shiny, but he continued to smirk at Klaus. This was surprising. (8.11-18)

"You're not looking in the right place," Count Olaf said. "For children who read so much, you two are remarkably unintelligent." (9.5)

Violet stared at him. She had an odd feeling in her stomach, as if she were the one being thrown from a great height. The really frightening thing about Olaf, she realized, was that he was very smart after all. He wasn't merely an unsavory drunken brute, but an unsavory, clever drunken brute. (9.13)

"I may be a terrible man," Count Olaf said, "but I have been able to concoct a foolproof way of getting your fortune, which is more than you've been able to do." With that, he began to stride toward the house. "Remember that, orphans," he said. "You may have read more books than I have, but it didn't help you gain the upper hand in this situation. Now, give me that book which gave you such grand ideas, and do the chores assigned to you." (9.22)

Violet stayed still as a statue. She hadn't been listening to that last speech of Count Olaf's, knowing it would be full of the usual self-congratulatory nonsense and despicable insults. She was staring at the tower, not at the top, where her sister was dangling, but the whole length of it. Klaus looked back at her and saw something he hadn't seen in quite some time. To those who hadn't been around Violet long, nothing would have seemed unusual, but those who knew her well knew that when she tied her hair up in a ribbon to keep it out of her eyes, it meant that the gears and levers of her inventing brain were whirring at top speed. (9.23)

"I'm—I'm afraid Olaf is right," Justice Strauss said, through her tears. "This marriage is legally binding."

"Begging your pardon," Violet said suddenly, "but I think you may be wrong."

Everyone turned to look at the eldest Baudelaire orphan.

"What did you say, Countess?" Olaf said.

"I'm not your countess," Violet said testily, a word which here means "in an extremely annoyed tone." "At least, I don't think I am."

"And why is that?" Count Olaf said.

"I did not sign the document in my own hand, as the law states," Violet said.

"What do you mean? We all saw you!" Count Olaf's eyebrow was beginning to rise in anger.

"I'm afraid your husband is right, dear," Justice Strauss said sadly. "There's no use denying it. There are too many witnesses."

"Like most people," Violet said, "I am right-handed. But I signed the document with my left hand."

"What?" Count Olaf cried. He snatched the paper from Justice Strauss and looked down at it. His eyes were shining very bright. "You are a liar!" he hissed at Violet.

"No she's not," Klaus said excitedly. "I remember, because I watched her left hand trembling as she signed her name."

"It is impossible to prove," Count Olaf said.

"If you like," Violet said, "I shall be happy to sign my name again, on a separate sheet of paper, with my right hand and then with my left. Then we can see which signature the one on the document most resembles."

"A small detail, like which hand you used to sign," Count Olaf said, "doesn't matter in the least."

"If you don't mind, sir," Mr. Poe said, "I'd like Justice Strauss to make that decision." (13.21-36)

Violet, Klaus, and Sunny looked at one another and knew that it wasn't as simple as Mr. Poe said. Count Olaf would take care to stay out of sight as he planned his next move. He was far too clever to be captured by the likes of Mr. Poe. (13.67)