Alatiel
Intro
- Storyteller: Panfilo
- Panfilo opens by calling Fortune a fickle wench. No one's immune from the "accidents" of Fortune.
- If you want to be happy, you've got to accept your lot as it falls.
- Then he gives a shout-out to the ladies: women sin through their desire to be beautiful.
- So he's going to tell a story that combines these two ideas, about a woman who was "unfortunately" beautiful.
Story
- Beminidab is the name of the Sultan of Babylon even though it sounds like a new treatment for rheumatoid arthritis.
- He has a smoking hot daughter called Alatiel.
- She's been promised in marriage to the King of Algarve (modern day Morocco).
- So the Sultan fits out a ship and sends Alatiel off to her bridegroom.
- But here comes Fortune, the grumpy harlot. A storm blows up and destroys ship and crew.
- Alatiel survives with a few of her women, but now they're alone on a foreign shore.
- A nobleman named Pericone da Visalgo finds her.
- He can't speak her language, but beauty speaks for itself. Pericone falls hard for Alatiel.
- He decides to keep her as his mistress, if he can't actually marry her.
- Alatiel instructs her maidens to keep their identity a secret.
- Meanwhile, Pericone's getting hot and bothered—he doesn't know how to get Alatiel into his bed.
- So he tries what many another young man has done: he plies her with alcohol.
- It works. Alatiel doesn't know what she's been so worried about. The whole sex thing is pretty enjoyable.
- But Fortune is fickle. Have we said that?
- Pericone has a brother called Marato. He's into Alatiel, too.
- So Marato and his friends break into Pericone's house, murder him, and steal his stuff.
- Including Alatiel.
- They get on a ship for Corinth.
- Alatiel's freaked out, but apparently Marato has, um, his ways of consoling her.
- But, you know, Fortune.
- The ship's captained by two Genoese men, both of whom fall in love with Alatiel.
- They conspire together to get her, but they don't work out the fine details (like who gets her first).
- So they wind up pushing Marato overboard and then fighting each other for the girl.
- One dies and the other is injured. Body count=3.
- But the remaining guy "inherits" Alatiel and takes her to his house in Corinth.
- Beauty of this caliber can't be hidden for long. The Prince of Morea (The Peloponnese) hears of Alatiel's beauty.
- And a Prince trumps a sea captain, so he "wins" her.
- Because Alatiel's very high-class, the Prince treats her more like a wife.
- Alatiel feels fortunate and that makes her more beautiful. And that causes more trouble.
- Now, the Duke of Athens hears about her beauty.
- He murders the Prince (that's 4) and shoves him out his bedroom window.
- The Duke discovers Alatiel sleeping naked and is so aroused that he makes love to her with the Prince's blood still on his hands. Ew.
- Alatiel's spirited away by the Duke. But the Duke has a wife, so he keeps Alatiel secretly.
- Back at the Prince's house, they've figured out what happened and prepare to go to war with the Duke of Athens.
- The Duke prepares to defend himself and gathers his allies. And this is where the family tree comes into play.
- The Emperor of Constantinople sends his son, Constant. Constant is the brother of the Duke's wife.
- Did we mention that the Duchess is NOT happy about Alatiel?
- Constant's eager to meet Alatiel. Guess why?
- So instead of making war, Constant fakes illness and goes back to his sister. He promises to help her out by removing Alatiel. Because, you know, that's the kind of good bro he is.
- So he fits out a boat and abducts Alatiel, who has to take her pleasure where she can get it.
- But it's not over yet. Meet Uzbek, King of the Turks.
- He sees that Constant puts all his attention on his mistress and knows it's a good opportunity to attack.
- Uzbek conquers Constant and takes prisoners.
- Guess who's among them?
- Constant's father is not pleased about all this, so he works with the King of Cappadoccia to attack Uzbek.
- Together, they kill him and conquer the land.
- We've lost count of all the men who died for Alatiel.
- Alatiel's been left in the hands of Antico, Uzbek's faithful servant.
- Who's—you guessed it—smitten with Alatiel's beauty. But he also speaks her language, so Alatiel is won over.
- They flee together to Rhodes after Uzbek's death. Antico becomes ill and dies.
- He bequeaths his property to a Cypriot merchant. This property includes Alatiel.
- Now Fortune's wheel turns again. An old servant of her father's spots her. His name is Antigono.
- He urges her to tell of her misfortunes so that he can help her. She does.
- Antigono comes up with a plan to restore Alatiel to her former life. He instructs her in what to say.
- Then he negotiates with her father to bring Alatiel home.
- Alatiel tells an, um, "allegorical" version of her adventures to her dad, including a stay in a nunnery and adventures that are all chaperoned at every step.
- The Sultan falls for it, and makes arrangements for Alatiel to marry the King of Algarve. Again.
- But this time it sticks, and Alatiel is somehow able to convince her husband the King that she's a virgin.
- Which means, in this world, that they live happily ever after.
- Fun fact: the translator points out that Alatiel is an anagram for " la lieta," which means "happy woman." Boccaccio is maybe slyly suggesting that he knows what it is that makes women happy.